This is the hall of mirrors. Where you will face yourself. Buckle up.
Totally hate Valentines Day. Yeah sure, the thought's nice. Take a day and tell your spouse you love them, give them presents, wear supah-sexy panties, have monkey sex, go to a fancy dinner somewhere nice, blah, blah, blah. But it's just so commercial and...expected
now. I had an epic rant about Valentines Day last year. Not going to repeat it again, so fear not.
My husband and I got married Feb 8th. So we made a pact once upon a time, to never celebrate Valentines Day and if we did, it would be totally cliche, and just a corny "bonus" of sorts. Last year, he walked in the door with a massive, tacky Mylar heart shaped balloon. We giggled, rolled our eyes, and ate dinner with the kids. Then shopped 1/2 off Chocolate Sales on the 15th. (Which should be the real holiday!)
This year, I'm doing a goofy little thing every day up to the 14th. It's free, it's silly. We're not taking the holiday seriously. What we have now, what we have been rebuilding, cannot be expressed on one single day of the calendar year. We live it and show it every day. We don't need assistance from Cupid. Sorry little diaper dude.
Due to the reason all of us are here, I understand how Valentines Day can be difficult for everyone. BS, I encourage you to not stress out about it. If you don't want to celebrate, don't. If you want to boycott it, feel free. If you want grand gestures, ask for it. WS, if you are unsure of what to do, ask your BS how they want to proceed. You BS's safety is paramount. Take their lead. We've dropped a bomb on our marriage and we need to maneuver this Valentines Day nightmare with grace, tact, and concern for our spouse's well-being.
Maybe skip Valentines Day completely and make a fun date shopping candy sales the day after. Rent a movie from Redbox on your way home. Veg out on the couch in front of the tv, and binge on your new candy stash. Make Velentines Day about your children. Focus on them. Make heart shaped food and desserts for them. Write love letters to them. If you don't have children, pamper your pets, or nieces and nephews. Or, don't celebrate at all.
Bottom line, it's really just another day. Society and the commercial world would have us believe that it's a huge, hairy deal. That you *have* to do stuff, you *have* to have or be someone's Valentine, that you *have* to receive or give flowers and chocolate. But really, it's just. another. day. You don't have to celebrate it, you don't have to make grand gestures, you don't have to stress yourself out about it, you don't have to participate in a "traditional" way. And whatever way you do or do not celebrate it, is completely ok!
Give yourself the gift of not stressing over it. Cupid really won't mind. Last I checked, he's in the imaginary league with the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, Sandman, and Santa.
[This message edited by Aubrie at 2:16 PM, January 27th (Monday)]
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne