The mods will probably inform you that your question should have been posted in the I Can Relate
forum on the BS Questions for WS's thread
however, I will try to quickly mention one thing.
Could you not see that by granting her privilege of working to R that in fact you are showing everyone that you have a love that is strong enough that you can risk giving your WW a second chance. This shows that you are confident and strong in the love you feel for your wife. Yes, she made a mistake and instead of throwing her to the wolves so to speak, you have the faith in her inherent ability to be the wife once more that she once was.
Trust me, by extending me the choice of R, my wife showed me what true eternal love was and for that, I will be eternally grateful.