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musiclovingmom (original poster member #38207) posted at 11:07 PM on Thursday, January 30th, 2014
I never really have. My H and I haven't done anything particularly special to celebrate it - either before dday or after (except the very first one he surprised me with a dozen roses). This year, for some reason, I'm feeling it more. We are leaving for a family weekend away on Valentine's day. That's our big 'gift' if you will. But, in addition to that, I'm doing small gifts every day for the next 14 days (mostly snack food). Each one has a cheesy line that incorporates the gift (ie - pop rocks with a tag that says 'you rock' and gumballs with a tag that says 'I chews you'). I actually planned a completely separate shopping trip just to get the various components. And you know what? I'm actually excited. It's just the kind of cheesy silliness that we used to have and I'm really happy that we've come far enough on this journey for me to start feeling that giddy in-love again.
HardenMyHeart ( member #15902) posted at 6:55 AM on Friday, January 31st, 2014
Me: BH, Her: WW, Married 40 years, Reconciled
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 5:22 PM on Friday, January 31st, 2014
What a cool idea! 
Sunset22 ( new member #42025) posted at 8:24 PM on Friday, January 31st, 2014
He wants to spoil me this Valentine's Day but I don't know if I'm up to it.
musiclovingmom (original poster member #38207) posted at 9:03 PM on Friday, January 31st, 2014
Oh Sunset, I barely made it through last year with a simple, at home celebration - and that was 7 months out. Don't let him pressure you into anything you're not ready for.
creativecat ( member #41728) posted at 12:52 AM on Saturday, February 1st, 2014
Sounds delightful! It's nice when can feel lighthearted about something! Have a wonderful two week lead-up to your cheesy-silly-love-filled day!
HardenMyHeart ( member #15902) posted at 8:53 PM on Sunday, February 2nd, 2014
Begin t/j
He wants to spoil me this Valentine's Day but I don't know if I'm up to it.
I understand; that can be really tough this early into R. On the one hand, you know it would be good for R to start connecting again; on the other hand, who feels like celebrating anything when you're in so much pain.
I guess I would try to do my best to have fun and to remind myself I am doing this for R. Try to stay in the moment and go with the flow; although I know that is much easier said than done.
(((Sunset22))) So sorry for what you are going through.
End t/j
[This message edited by HardenMyHeart at 4:06 PM, February 2nd (Sunday)]
Me: BH, Her: WW, Married 40 years, Reconciled
LA44 ( member #38384) posted at 10:45 PM on Sunday, February 2nd, 2014
I like your ideas MLM. Fun! It has never been great for us. Last year I sabotaged it - too fresh still. We did have a nice dinner in two days later. He took care of it all. This year, same thing - we will celebrate on the 16th!
Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear
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