Two months ago I confronted my husband about his A with my "friend". It was a daily texting, once moth sex fest affair in crack motel an hour each time. I knew most two yrs ago he was doing this. I didn't confront bc I had to become stronger and give him time to see if he came back to me
Signs showed me he loved me and our family. She tried to pull him to her, but I knew in my heart he was mine all along. We've been married 16 yrs and together since I was 19
This was the love of my life. I chose him; I could have had many others. Although he came with some baggage, I knew the day I slept with him, he was my soul mate.
2 kids later and a marriage where we put the children first always, he chose to live out a fantasy. I watched it eat at him. I saw the sadness, anger with himself, and discontent numerous times over these two yrs.
Two months to the day I have been healing my broken heart. A man who had my utmost respect has to live with himself knowing he lost that. He has to live with knowing he destroyed the trust and faith of a woman who would have done anything for him. Over the past few months, I have changed. I have become stronger. My heart will never "trust " him, but I will always love him.
The days are getting easier. I still dream about er 5/7 nights. I still become sad for what he did to our marriage. I do know that I will be okay. I'm not sure if I will remain married to the man I love, I'm still trying to figure our what's best for ME and my kids. I'm enjoying the time spent together these two months, bonding sexually and emotionally. Holding each other while we cry for or lost marriage. I wouldn't wish this journey on my worst enemy but I know things happens for a reason and one day I will know what that reason is. Maybe it's to become stronger and create a new life together as we get older? Maybe it's to begin a life without each other? Maybe it will allow me to help others who experience that same pain.
I write this just to share where I am two months out and also to say thank you to those on here who have pushed me to keep going. I know I will be ok no matter what.