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kellys2014 posted 2/4/2014 23:39 PM

Trying to be really strong. Not doing a very good job.

[This message edited by kellys2014 at 1:20 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)]

annb posted 2/5/2014 01:49 AM

((((kellys)))

There is no easy exit off the roller coaster, sad to say.

You need to take one day at a time, one hour at a time if necessary.

Do your best to take care of you, and meet with your doctor if you are having difficulty coping. Get out of your environment as often as you can, you will experience snippets of normalcy away from the places/people that pull you down.

What you are feeling is very, very normal, and with time you will begin to feel better and more in control.

ShedSomeLight posted 2/5/2014 05:32 AM

(((Kelly)))

It is not an easy process, but just remember one thing...you are going to ok and get through it. I told minimal people, but I had my Sister to talk to and my two best friends. I hope you have at least one person you can talk to. I got into therapy right away as well and have been going for six months. We are working things out and it is going VERY well, My DDay was 7/31/13. I can say six months out, that I do not think about it every day anymore. One huge mistake I made was not taking care of myself. I stopped eating and lost a lot of weight and got extremely run down. Please do not do that like I did !!! If you can't sleep, see your doctor or try some sleep herbs like Valerian root. Take care of you. I promise that things will get better. ((Hugs to you ))

nekorb posted 2/5/2014 07:22 AM

It IS a roller coaster, isn't it? One minute you're fine, the next minute your sobbing in the bookstore because if whatever stupid song came on the Musak. One day feeling pretty good, the next day barely functioning.

I'll be glad when I'm at the part where the ride slows down and I can get back on solid ground.

(((Hugs)))

We will be ok

Sadmomandwife posted 2/5/2014 15:34 PM

Hugs to you. I feel your pain. I feel exactly the same way. Up and down for no reason in particular. Today is exactly 3 weeks from my Dday. It just so happened that I looked down at my phone today at the exact same time that I found out 3 weeks ago. I am so ready for the mood swings to stop. In my head, I know it will get easier but sometimes it's so hard.

Uhtred posted 2/5/2014 18:22 PM

You keep your chin up the best you can and hang on tight. Sending positive thoughts your way.

forwardfromhere posted 2/5/2014 18:38 PM

I'm so sorry. It really is awful, worse than the death of a family member. My cat is great at reading me, he keeps me sane. Another thing that helps me is a laugh. Someecards.com is great for that and some of the more experienced posters here have funny points to share. Toilet baths for toothbrushes, demands from WS to AP that show how unhinged the WS is or great names like douchecanoe and fuckwit. You're not alone. Hugs!

nekorb posted 2/5/2014 18:46 PM

So weird you said that as I've been thinking that this hurts worse than my mother dying.

kellys2014 posted 2/5/2014 18:59 PM

Yes, this is the worst thing I've ever felt, with the exception of the time my son (then 3) was lost at the mall for 15-20 minutes.

Which puts this into perspective.

But it is still heart and gut-wrenching. I hope the OW can't sleep or eat, either. She says she feels "beyond ashamed" and always will and I hope that is true.

Oh well, just have to wait for the next wave of strength and optimism to arrive.

[This message edited by kellys2014 at 7:00 PM, February 5th (Wednesday)]