SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Saw a mention about "property damage" as therapy in another thread. Have also seen numerous mentions of breaking things, holes in walls, and the like.

What inanimate objects have felt your wrath?

For me, it was one bed- complete mattress, box spring, headboard burned. One remote control smashed, and one lamp knocked over and broken.

My office desk in the basement was a cheap pine table from Christmas Tree Shop. WH used to carve our initials in it all the time "WH loves BS", "WH loves ONLY BS", "WH + BS, TLA". I loved it.

Dday I carved "I hate WH", "BS hates WH 4EVA", "WH is lying, cheating ass", "WH is a lying WHORE". On the original things he carved I sharpied "Lies, all lies". It is where he had his coffee and that was his view first thing every morning. The table is set to go in the fire pit now because I can't stand looking at it.

I tried to smash some of our wedding photos but they wouldn't break. So I threw them in the trash. WH would fish them out and the next day I would throw them away again. He finally took them out and hid them - no idea where they are.

Unfortunately I also broke a window throwing those frames that wouldn't break.

Punched a hole in our bedroom wall on dday - that was almost 9 years ago - repaired it yesterday!

Same with our closet door.

Also broke a table, a chair, 2 lamps, an expensive print, wife’s company laptop, the glass shower door, etc.

And, of course, my hand

A few things. One that I remember was a paperback book OM gave WW.

The title.

Bridges of Madison County

of course. I tore that sucker to shreds.

Wedding pictures first. Followed by every picture I could find of XWW in the house, especially ones from the previous Christmas and New Years timeframe as that was the height of affair season. This was a combination of firepit on our patio and paper shredder. Picture frames are fun to smash too. Clothing and lingerie I didn't recognize and assumed was for AP bit the dust in the firepit too. Immature yes, but dammed satisfying at the time. Not quite as dramatic as Danny Devito tossing Barbara Hershey in "Tin Men" but along those lines.

When wheels set in motion for divorce, I went all out eradicating anything among my personal effects connected to her. Gifts, momentos all destroyed or given away. Wedding ring I pounded flat then gave the remains to my little sister who then had that melted and made into something for her so not a complete waste.

Looking back, it could have been handled better. But it was damn satisfying!

Hummm. I cut up a Victoria's Secret threadbare bathrobe that I had kept for decades because he gave it to me. Put it into the trash.

Showed great restraint when he was still TTing me by using language semantics about what he did or did not have on his computer, by laying a crowbar across the windshield of his sports car.

Took a set of glasses from the cupboard, a large rock, and our recycling bin and broke them, one by one, with the rock. Whispered names of his on-line whores over each glass too.

Threw out our wedding sampler that I made. Huge, cross-stitched thing on linen, about 2x3' and framed. He found it and hid it for quite some time.

Broke several glass items by throwing them against the wall. The red wine that smashed against his guitar was one of my favorite as the stain it made was rather pretty. Liked that so much, I followed it up with a tray table. A few picture frames meant their demise the same way. I'm a thrower.

Best one was taking a Persian carpet into the back yard with my sailing knife. Laid it on the table and stabbed it, sawed pieces off of it, tried to rip it apart with my bare hands but that didn't work. Stroked it in-between times whispering his stripper's name. Rather graphic visualizations of various parts of her anatomy that I was cutting off with each slice into the carpet. I'm a cutter too.

Oh yeah, I also sliced apart most of the corsets and other outfits that we had and trashed it. Cut every panel out and left just the framework of the garments. Be damned if I was ever going to wear those for him again.

As a slight TJ, did anyone else have the endorphin release that I did, when destroying something? I swear, while some of this was in a red-hot rage, there also was a sort of physical release during the destruction as well.

Was dropped off at home by friend and noticed that the car of one of my mother's friends who was allowing her to screw OM at her house was parked in the driveway. Before entering the house I keyed the shit out of the passenger side so they wouldn't notice until later. What? I was 17 at the time.

I put his Blackberry behind the back wheel of my car and drove over it. But the sucker wouldn't break so I had to bash it with a sledgehammer. I put the pieces in a baggie and gave it to FWH saying, "if this ever happens again, it'll be your nuts in this bag."

In 2010 when I suspected an affair and was told nothing ever happened, I had moments where I'd take off in the car, be gone for hours, even late a night after everyone went to sleep. I was a nutcase. I broke the glass coffee table in our living room (I picked up the glass part in a fit of rage and threw it on our hardwood floor), tried my damnedest to bust out the window of his truck (those things are tough!), dented the crap out of it, though, threw a flashlight and busted our wood interior door of our bedroom.

Since D-Day #2, I haven't broken anything. I have an odd sense of calm and have had since finding out. Yes, I get upset but nothing to the degree of 2010. Not sure what that was about.

In 2010 I took off my past/present/future diamond ring (its gorgeous!) and haven't put it back on since. I considered letting him watch me destroy it but I keep thinking I may need the money from it someday.

[This message edited by AppalachianGal at 9:23 AM, February 7th (Friday)]

Over a year ago, I was having a particularly bad day, full of anger and resentment. I must have had a bit too much wine with dinner, because while cleaning the kitchen, with my mind going crazy, I flung my rice cooker across the garage. Mind you, I can't live without my rice cooker. It's just one of those things. Later, my H asked how the rice cooker got such a huge dent...hmmmm, gave him one of his own vague answers by saying, "I don't know".

After my last dday in August, I opened my lingerie drawer, and one by one, very slowly, examining each thing carefully, threw everything away (all had been purchased when I foolishly thought we were both working towards R)right in front of him. Every. Single. Thing. Including my sexy bras. Gone. I filled a white hefty bag, to the top. He was stunned.I haven't replaced a thing yet.

Some day, I will replace my rice cooker and lingerie, but I'm not quite there yet. Getting there, ever so slowly. Sigh.

Where to start? Wedding pictures, Marriage license, Wedding glasses, punched a hole in the door, smashed her Iphone, crushed her wedding ring with a pair of pliars, threw mine in the garbage. I'm sure there is a lot more I just can't remember everything right now. To say I'm now an angry man is an understatement.

XWF has a rental property business. When he left me, he forgot to take three books of rent receipts. Soooo, in the interest of saving those poor people's privacy, I burned them. Tequila + firepit = oopsie. Wonder how his taxes went that year....

After dday with xwh, i broke a lot. He called and said i had 15 minutes to have his shit ready for him to pick up. So i threw it all over the driveway. All of it. Including a $200 glass bong shaped like a dragon. That brought him to his knees.

With dday1 a phone, a remote, a chair, multiple plates and bowls, a shower curtain, a mirror, a door, and a toilet seat.

Dday2, a plate.

I put his Blackberry behind the back wheel of my car and drove over it. But the sucker wouldn't break so I had to bash it with a sledgehammer. I put the pieces in a baggie and gave it to FWH saying, "if this ever happens again, it'll be your nuts in this bag."

awesome!

I made him a thing for Christmas that spelled LOVE in buttons! I tore it apart after DDay1. He said he would NEVER destroy something I made for him. ok, but my heart, I guess, is ok.

So I felt badly about it and made him antoher one for Valentines Day. He was in another affair by April 1st. I put that one in our guest bedroom as it's a pretty big trigger now.

He was THIS CLOSE to having his car destroyed by a baseball bat because he took so much time to sell it - OW2 had sat in it and made out with him and I demanded he sell it.

Collectible christmas village houses. He had a huge collection, like 200 houses not including accessories. I sold most of them on ebay to pay for a lawyer. Whatever didnt sell I took outside to the driveway and lifted them one by one with two hands above my head and smashed them into the asphalt. I feel good just thinking about it.

Kicked in bedroom door--or tried to. Couldn't so I went to garage to get the sledge hammer. Unfortunately when I got back he had opened the door. I was disappointed

Razor, the OW1 in our case gave him the movie version of Bridges of Madison County. That was destroyed along with a couple of water color pictures she painted. One went in the woodstove, the other into the shredder. OW2 sold him her old waterproof camera. We replaced it with a new one, then dear daughter found it and asked if she could have. Didn't think of a good enough reason fast enough to tell her why not, so now she has that. One of them gave him a small glass heart. I hit it with a hammer and still couldn't break it. It went into a dumpster. OW3 gave him an iphone. He had it one day before I caught him with it. Still waiting for good ideas with what to do with that. I am open to any suggestions........... I also threw out the outfit he was wearing when I found him with her. To bad, all so sad. Oh, and I destroyed some CDs of music they shared together. Plus, all of her lurrrrrve letters burned up in the wood stove. That happened twice because he told her I did that and then she reprinted them and sent them again. The 2ne time, he went to his work and brought them home to me. I read the first one and then burned all the rest, unread.

XWH had a huge CD collection of a particular singer. In a fit of pure evil, I took a sewing needle and ran it around each of the CDs in various spots within each song.

Not enough to be immediately noticeable if you glance at the CD, but not a single song would play straight through without skipping.

Another time, we were driving home from a winery and he had a CD playing. Since they were songs I knew were not his usual taste, I figured one of the OW made it for him.

I ejected the disc and took great pleasure in throwing the damned thing out the window.

I burned some if his clothes in the driveway the morning after dday#2.

I smashed a fake gold watch AP#2 gave him and sent it to signature required.

I burned all his work ties in the fireplace since he'd been fired.

I threw our wedding sampler that I had made and he had framed outside and smashed it. I did about three months after DD. It was the only thing I destroyed.