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I just discovered that my WH has possibly created a new underground email account.

Its a google account that required an outside email for verification, and he doesn't know I can see that inbox.

It doesn't look like he confirmed the account, but I have no idea what the email address is or what he was doing it for.

He's away on business right now and I feel like I should wait until tomorrow when he returns, so I can check his computer and see if I can find any more info.

Also - I hate that this is the person I've become. I don't want to be a detective. I want to trust. And love. And feel safe and not hyper vigilant.

At the same time, dumping my WH and dating new people - how do you know if other men won't be similar, be untrustworthy, have some issues that will lead to unhappiness? I feel resigned to my fate in this moment.

[This message edited by alleyk at 3:36 AM, February 10th (Monday)]

I'm sorry for you Alley. I can imagine how terrible you feel right now.

I know exactly what you mean about feeling the need to become a detective. And I feel like an interrogator to, since it can be so hard to get accurate information out.

Sorry I'm not more help. Just wanted you to know you are not alone.

(alleyk)

That's just it... You don't know other men aren't going to be that wY... But WH has proven is IS that way. A maybe is better than a definite IMO

That's why infidelity is a deal breaker for me. I would hate the person it would turn me into.

((Alley))