My husband was going through a midlife crisis and I could see that, he had no self esteem. We have been married 24 years and renewed our wedding vows two months before the A started. It lasted about three weeks over Christmas. That is the kicker, on Christmas two years before that 7 men broke into my sons house to kill him, they almost succeeded but his best friend intervened and was murdered. I became obsessed with the court cases and getting justice for my son and his friend, while my husband pretended nothing happened.
Now I feel like my life is out of control, he did this over Christmas which was when we needed him the most, and she was my friend, we had vacationed together, she had been to my house for dinner.
This is all brand new to me and I feel so lost, I don't see how it is possible to ever forgive him, as much as I do want to work things out, and grow stronger from all of this.
I know not to make any decisions while I am still so raw, but sometimes it seems a lot easier to give up than to fight.
Somewhere I found the strength to fight during the aftermath of the murder, and I have even forgiven the murderers (which some of them were my sons friends also).
I guess I am looking for any advice. If I can forgive murderers why do I feel so weak to forgive my husband.
He has been completely honest with me and complied with every demand I have made of him, he has cooperated in every sense. There is no contact with the other woman. And I still feel so little and weak.