BS me 41
WH 42 his whore was my friend
Married 24 years
Finally finding R?
3 kids 3 grand kids
DDay 1 -Jan 2 2014
DDay 2 -Feb 20 2014 A went underground fo
You are in shock - you have been traumatized. Take a second and breathe. Betrayal of any form is traumatizing, adding the double betrayal is just layering on the pain. The good news is you don't have to do anything right now. Just focus on you. Take your time to get your footing.
I'm really sorry you are here, but glad you found SI. Take time to read in the The Healing Library - the link is on the upper left. There is a ton of good material in there. And post here a lot - let your feelings out.
Was it your husband who told you? Does the husband of the OW, if she is married?
It will be a long road ahead no matter what but you can walk it. It is no fair to have to deal with this, but you've proven how strong you are in the past--remember that and trust yourself to survive this.
If I can forgive murderers why do I feel so weak to forgive my husband.
I would assume that you did not forgive the murderers right away; it probably took some time.
Like Tred said--you have been traumatized. You have been betrayed in one of the worst ways by the one you were closest to. Add the fact that his cheating partner was a friend of yours, and the betrayal is that much deeper.
Please keep reading and keep posting. It really can help.
All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary Puckett
Acceptance the Marriage is over: 7/2/14
Heading for D