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Newest Member: Sunflower96

Divorce/Separation :
Release the Kraken

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 tesla (original poster member #34697) posted at 10:49 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Well, the 10th has come and gone...No desperation text. Not even to mention when he could pay me.

Ironically, his health insurance was terminated yesterday at midnight as well. (Which he never informed me was going to happen...I only knew because I was periodically checking with the carrier.)

I've put Teslet on my health insurance. Am looking into a modification of the terms of the settlement (since he gets a credit for carrying Teslet on his insurance).

Requested that we go after the back child support. (Has not paid since beginning of last November.)

And we are taking the next step in the contempt process, which is to send him a letter requesting that he contact my lawyer's office regading the payment while filing another order to show cause hearing. L says that the court does not look kindly upon ZERO effort being made to clear contempt and that she fully expects that he will be incarcerated.

Hopefully the letter saying, "Hey you dumb piece of shit, pay your money NOW or you are going to JAIL!" will spur him into action.

Then again, I doubt it. He's out of a job and needs money. Any tax refund or bonus he gets he is going to need to pay his bills at this point.

I don't even get how someone can be so fucking stupid.

[This message edited by tesla at 4:59 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)]

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

posts: 5066   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2012
id 6681443
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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 10:57 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

He is still in fantasy land where he won the last contempt hearing

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 6681457
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IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 11:11 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

I am quite sure that he is planning to win the lottery and take care of all the financials with the winnings. If you would just get on board with his plan, read his mind and be a little patient and understanding everything would work out in unicorn/rainbow fartland.

Oh, this is getting good. I'm getting my popcorn and the whiskey and coke.

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

posts: 1858   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: WA
id 6681476
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Crescita ( member #32616) posted at 11:21 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Then again, I doubt it. He's out of a job and needs money. Any tax refund or bonus he gets he is going to need to pay his bills at this point.

I know he isn't working, so wage garnishing is out, but wouldn't child support services snag the tax return?

“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

posts: 3640   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2011   ·   location: The Valley of the Sun
id 6681495
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movingforward13 ( member #38405) posted at 11:51 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Damn his life is just falling apart now isn't it... Dumb ass

Once a cheater, always a cheater happens when your cheater doesn't have remorse.
Regret is not remorse- know the difference!

posts: 683   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2013   ·   location: DC
id 6681531
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Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 11:53 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Dementors. He gets dementors.

What a jagoff. If he is incarcerated, and unable to care for a jointly owned pet,...... Just sayin.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6681536
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 12:02 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

The unicorn isn't happy anymore.

The unicorn is leaving this fairy tale.

Shit's about to get real.

Wait. That's not right. Try again.

Okay. Here we go. Try again. Tesla is rightfully pissed off. Let 'er rip, Krakkie!

[This message edited by Nature_Girl at 6:03 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)]

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6681545
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debbysbaby ( member #32962) posted at 1:23 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

Sic'em Tesla!

And NG, lol!

-betrayed almost my whole almost 15 yr marriage
-divorced since 2004

posts: 1025   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2011
id 6681675
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 tesla (original poster member #34697) posted at 1:47 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

NG - that was fucking hysterical.

As to whether CS services will get the tax return...doubtful, since he can only expect money back from his federal return (he always ends up owing the state since he works in a different state) and he may get his refund back before we have a chance to do anything.

His options are very limited.

The only bad thing about this is that the last time his options were very limited, he kicked in my door and stole Mosley.

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

posts: 5066   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2012
id 6681717
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SBB ( member #35229) posted at 2:15 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

He's like a deer who hides behind a tree and thinks it can't be seen.

Do I remember correctly that he told stripperwhore he owns their rental place?

I agree, Tesla - this is beyond 'normal' asshattery - he is clearly unhinged and not in a funny way. Do you have sensors/video surveillance?

Again, I'm hating being grateful for the sad clown right now.

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

posts: 6062   ·   registered: Apr. 4th, 2012   ·   location: Australia
id 6681748
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caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 2:46 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

(((tesla)))

The stress! I wish he'd be less fucking stupid.

Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

posts: 7063   ·   registered: May. 27th, 2010   ·   location: a better place
id 6681791
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tryingagain74 ( member #33698) posted at 3:13 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

May Zeus smile down on you while the Kraken gobbles your ex-shat up whole, sending his soul to Tartarus.

Actually, Hades probably wouldn't want him. May your ex-shat enjoy his second life as a turd after the Kraken digests him.

FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

posts: 4079   ·   registered: Oct. 22nd, 2011
id 6681823
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newlysingle ( member #38735) posted at 3:42 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

I missed that he lost his job. How did that happen?

BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13

posts: 1273   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2013   ·   location: AZ
id 6681846
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courageous ( member #34477) posted at 3:44 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

But how is stripper whore ever going to earn her pony?

In all seriousness now.... That totally suck having to dish out so much money because the ex is such a jerk/ idjat.

Please keep us posted. I hope he doesn't try to break in your house again or hurt you and teslet. There might be quite of few of us that would need our earrings held if he does.

Me: BW (in my 40's) Him: ExWH EA/PA with MOW coworker(also married). He ended up marrying his mistress.

posts: 880   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2012   ·   location: Texas
id 6681851
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 tesla (original poster member #34697) posted at 4:33 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

SBB - yes, he told stripper whore that he bought the house they live in but it is a rental.

newlysingle - he was suspended with pay sometime in November or December for being caught drunk on the job. I understand that his company had been following him around for a couple of weeks to build the case before they made him take a breathalizer. He was given the option to attend a rehab program in order to keep his job (all while still being paid!) I believe he was milking the suspension with pay for all he could, thinking that he could just go get another job. When the other job wasn't panning he out, he went to the rehab...but failed a test (hmmmm....whatever could that be?) and the company kicked him out of the program and suspended him without pay. I assume he lost his job...or at the very least did not pay the health ins premiums since I found out there was a termination date on Teslet's health ins.

So, needless to say...the guy is in a shit spot right now.

I've had the CS numbers rerun, assuming he has the same paying job and in every scenario, his CS amount increases. My L says that it is possible that he could argue that he has no income and should not have his prior income counted. But she says that given the circumstances of his job loss, there is a good chance the judge wouldn't care and would keep his income number the same. I would love to get on record precisely why he lost that job as it could potentially have implications with visitations. (If anyone has had a similar experience and wouldn't mind posting or sending me a pm, I'd appreciate hearing about it.) I need to decide soon if I want the CS modification to go through...like tomorrow...because if it is in my favor...the sooner I file that petition the better.

Way too much to think about.

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

posts: 5066   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2012
id 6681897
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BAB61 ( member #41181) posted at 5:11 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

Have not had to deal with this yet, the D ain't happening until Jun/Jul .. but I'll be sending you positive thoughts and prayers.

Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

posts: 1271   ·   registered: Oct. 31st, 2013   ·   location: DE
id 6681928
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thebighurt ( member #34722) posted at 8:06 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

I can't believe the stupidity of someone losing that kind of job over that!! Well, except in the case of exshat, that is.

I worked in the same kind of business. It happened there, and virtually every time, we all shook our heads and wondered just what kind of idiot they were. They give you so many opportunities to come clean and offer all kinds of help.

This really does put you all in a hard spot. You almost have to root for him to get his job back so maybe you end up with *some* money. Jail is what he deserves, but that just makes everything worse.

((((Tesla and Teslet)))) I'm glad you could put him on your medical. Also rooting for this to somehow free Mosley from the insanity of unicorn fartland (finally) and hoping for your safety.

Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

posts: 5033   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: the Other Side
id 6682005
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thebighurt ( member #34722) posted at 8:07 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

And, thanks for the laughs, NG.

Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

posts: 5033   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: the Other Side
id 6682006
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k94ever ( member #11176) posted at 4:19 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

Have you thought about blackmailing him with Mosely?

Like, negate one month of CS in exchange for ownership of Mosely.

k9

BS:61
WS: 53
Betrayed: 24 years
Affairs: 15 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

posts: 7747   ·   registered: Jul. 3rd, 2006   ·   location: Wisconsin
id 6682344
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movingforward13 ( member #38405) posted at 4:24 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

Send the remodification through. This isn't your fault he fucked up his life. Remember, he wasn't thinking about you when he was banging the stripper. I see him begging to be back with you in the next few years because as dumb as that whore is, I am sure she will start cheating when she realizes your ex is broke.

[This message edited by movingforward13 at 10:25 AM, February 12th (Wednesday)]

Once a cheater, always a cheater happens when your cheater doesn't have remorse.
Regret is not remorse- know the difference!

posts: 683   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2013   ·   location: DC
id 6682349
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