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Divorce/Separation :
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 kg201 (original poster member #40173) posted at 12:13 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

Went with a cop to my house to pick up clothes for my RO hearing, a computer, and bills/tax docs. My STBX was there, and it threw me off, as I wasn't expecting her to be there. It felt like she was mocking me the whole time I was in the house. She challenged me on taking the docs out of the house and the cop told me to leave them there. I stormed out of the house to avoid being anywhere near her. The cop started yelling at me for giving him a hard time.

Just so frustrating that I am being treated like a criminal, when the person who destroyed our family is able to file frivolous restraining orders, when I haven't done anything to threaten her. Just so frustrating. Nervous about not being treated fairly at the hearing.

[This message edited by kg201 at 6:14 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)]

Me: BH, 40
Her: Ms. Daisy
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, living together
Dday: 7/28/13
Ds17, DS12, DD12
Divorced! 2/24/2015
Apology. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

posts: 1155   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2013
id 6681560
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nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 12:48 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

I'm sorry.

I hope it goes well for you.

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman

posts: 5796   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2013
id 6681620
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BAB61 ( member #41181) posted at 5:02 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

damn ... that truly sucks ...

Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

posts: 1271   ·   registered: Oct. 31st, 2013   ·   location: DE
id 6681922
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Rainbows ( member #39362) posted at 8:16 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

I'm so sorry and get it.

Remember to stay very calm at the hearing, no matter what. Stick with the facts, be genuine and don't editorialize. You want to show the judge you are honest and in total control of your emotions.

Hopefully you've documented everything thoroughly. Take notes during your STBX's testimony. Calmly point out inconsistencies to your L if your Ex contradicts herself.

Judges know people use RO's to gain unfair advantages in divorces all the time and they prefer not to issue them unless it's really necessary.

The bottom line is to show the judge there's no need for one against you because you respect boundaries and care about everybody's well being. You want everyone to move forward with their lives peacefully and amicably.

I know you have an L, but the judge may ask you questions. Show him you're on the high road. Be sure to wear your best collected and sincere face for this one and it'll be ok.

There is always a rainbow after every storm.

posts: 415   ·   registered: May. 26th, 2013   ·   location: California
id 6682010
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careerlady ( member #16958) posted at 8:50 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

(((Kg201)))

So unfair! I'm so sorry. I hope this whole thing backfires majorly!

Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI

posts: 949   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2007   ·   location: Northern California
id 6682838
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