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Newest Member: harleyhugs (45741)

User Topic: Family Contacted by OW
strongerdaybyday
♀ 40264
Member # 40264
Default  Posted: 10:52 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I originally posted this in I Can Relate - OC but have yet to receive a response (I know people are busy ) But I was hoping to get some general advice here's the post:

Help. OW sent my mom a facebook message. Basically saying that H and I are heartless monsters and that I fabricated a fake DNA test saying he wasn’t the father to help him get out of his responsibility (I did NOT). She went on and on how karma will get us and she can’t wait to see him back in court. She also said that God is watching over her son and sees what we’re doing. This all happened after they had an argument and he said he wished he never met her, and, wished the kid wasn’t his because then he wouldn’t have to deal with her (he called her because someone sent a picture to him in the mail of her ex with the words “u sure?” on the back) and he assumed it was a game she was playing. Why message my mom? I was tempted to call her but whats the point. She said that I’m keeping father and son apart. Not once did I force NC on my H. That was his decision – I told him that while things aren’t the best right now we can work on us C or NC. He chose this but now she’s getting MY family involved. What do I do? I called the police re: restraining order but they said all I can do is file a complaint.
And his parents said don’t bother with the police either – bring the message to court. They said if we get police involved she may turn it around and say he hit her or something. She also took my childs pic from facebook and put it beside her sons and emailed my mom saying how much they look alike and that we're heartless monsters.

I know his fault was even calling her after receiving the picture but now what? I'm now concerned about how far she'll go - especially since she's looking up daughter on FB.


Me-BW Him - WH
Married 6 years, together 13+ years
D-Day Summer 2013
children-3
If it is what it is then what is it?

**If I edit I'm correcting a typo!**


Posts: 384 | Registered: Aug 2013
headdesk
♀ 40787
Member # 40787
Default  Posted: 10:57 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Block her on fb now. Then it may be worth going to a lawyer to see what you can legally do and to get him to draw up one of those 'nc or we'll apply for a restraining order/report all your craziness to the police' letters.

Also, report EVERYTHING to the police and keep a log book of every interaction she has with you - dated and timed. Also put in there any actions you're taking, like reporting to police - get the name/badge number each time - and if you talk to her what you say. If you have to talk to her for whatever reason (but really, crickets is the best you can do with her) then record it.

Best of luck with the bunny boiler. Hang in there!


Me: 39
WH: 42
DDay:Sep 19 2013 (only TT of EA)
Oct 4th 2013 revealed PA through snooping.
Marred 16 years, together for 20. Looking to R at this time. We have awesome kids (12/14).

Posts: 273 | Registered: Sep 2013
gahurts
♂ 33699
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 10:59 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. Sorry, no advice but I wanted you to know you've been heard. That is way messed up. I would have thought calling the police and asking for an RO would have done some good. Maybe you should call a L and have the L file an RO on your behalf. You should not have to live in fear that she could go psycho crazy on you or your family.

[This message edited by gahurts at 10:59 AM, February 12th (Wednesday)]


"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie


Posts: 3469 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
Kelany
♀ 34755
Member # 34755
Default  Posted: 11:01 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So wait, it's proven he's not the child's father through a DNA test? Why do you still have to go to court?


BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12

Former 80s Icon wishful thinking


Posts: 2031 | Registered: Feb 2012
strongerdaybyday
♀ 40264
Member # 40264
Default  Posted: 11:03 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@Samantha - he is the dad. She was lying to make me look horrible. I never made up a fake DNA test. But she's telling people I did.


Me-BW Him - WH
Married 6 years, together 13+ years
D-Day Summer 2013
children-3
If it is what it is then what is it?

**If I edit I'm correcting a typo!**


Posts: 384 | Registered: Aug 2013
Kelany
♀ 34755
Member # 34755
Default  Posted: 11:09 AM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bring that shit to court.

As long as he is meeting his CS obligation, NC is fine.

Have your family block her after a FIRM do not contact me message. Keep copies of everything. Make police reports.

She's ticked her fantasy blew up. Poor wittle OW. Shoulda kept her legs shut.


BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12

Former 80s Icon wishful thinking


Posts: 2031 | Registered: Feb 2012
strongerdaybyday
♀ 40264
Member # 40264
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks all. I'm going to report it tonight.

and Samantha

Shoulda kept her legs shut.
is exactly what I think.


Me-BW Him - WH
Married 6 years, together 13+ years
D-Day Summer 2013
children-3
If it is what it is then what is it?

**If I edit I'm correcting a typo!**


Posts: 384 | Registered: Aug 2013
itainteasy
♀ 31094
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Why did she contact your mom? Simple. She wasn't getting the reaction she wanted from YOU.

She's psycho. If your family doesn't know about this, you may want to tell them on YOUR terms, so they don't hear it on hers.

Also document every contact attempt, every message, every drive by, everything. Get a running log going with the police and take your evidence to court.

I'm so sorry.


Posts: 3425 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
callmecrazy
♀ 38765
Member # 38765
Default  Posted: 12:34 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She is CRAZY!!! Have as little to do with her as possible and let your family know that they need to be silent as well. Restraining order if it goes into that kind of harrassment.

Posts: 279 | Registered: Mar 2013
norabird
♀ 42092
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 3:12 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Block and crickets and document is what comes to mind. So sorry she is dragging you through this.


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4203 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Ostrich80
34827
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 4:24 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh boy, she's nuts. I agree, get the police involved. I feel for you having to deal this mess. I would be afraid for ws to even be involved with oc, she's capable of anything. That poor baby, having a crazy mother, God help him.


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5238 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
whattheh
♀ 40032
Member # 40032
Default  Posted: 5:01 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Also make sure you tell the police that she sent a pic of your son in email without permission to do so. That may not be kosher without your permission given child is minor? Either way they should know this detail.


BW- mid 50's (me)
fWH-late 50's
M 33 T 35
DD-Early 2013 PA 2010
In R but I have PTSD...

Posts: 590 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
cantgetup
♀ 36146
Member # 36146
Default  Posted: 6:20 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. So sorry. What a mess. Give you props for standing by your WH given your sitch. I would not be doing that if I were in your shoes.

Posts: 319 | Registered: Jul 2012
Topic Posts: 13

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