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MammaMia posted 2/13/2014 18:43 PM

After Dday what does Valentine's Day mean to you?
How do you plan to spend it and are you going to give your WS a gift?

It does not mean much to me anymore. I have already told him there should be no gifts. I hope he listens. No plans for that day.

hurtingfool posted 2/13/2014 18:51 PM

Means jack to me. I'd do stuff throughout the year anyway, so this was more of a day for a slightly bigger bouquet or something.

Keep getting people making chit chat during doctor visits asking what I was doing for VD (ring is a dead give away I guess). They don't seem to like it when you say absolutely nothing.

Actually, I might make myself a steak, get her some hamburger or something. Or liver, I know she hates liver.

RidingHealingRd posted 2/13/2014 19:03 PM

Pre Dday my WH never acknowledged the day. As my DSs got older they would send flower. I would tell them not to spend their money doing that and my older son responded with, "I do it because I know Dad won't" His response made my heart hurt.

Today, that makes my WH feel like a complete POS.

Post Dday my WH acknowledges all occasions. The only one that bothers me is our Anniversary. I prefer it go unnoticed.

My WH is out of the country, returns tomorrow night. This afternoon a delivery of 2 dozen roses arrived at my house from him. They are nice but sadly, they are also tainted with the memory of his A.

Will I give him a gift? Absolutely not. He got a wonderful gift...the gift of being able to remain in my life. He expects nothing.

Lovedyoumore posted 2/13/2014 19:21 PM

Valentine's day is a huge trigger. The A was going on and I cannot even bring myself to type what happened that day. So since the A, the day represents pain and hurt. One day maybe not, but for now, I hate the day.

kate0421 posted 2/13/2014 20:29 PM

I am afraid of what it's going to be like. He was never a huge " valentines" guy. Just the flowers, card, stuffed animal or chocolates cliche. Always ran out last minute to get it all. It now means nothing to me. I did get him a card, I was in a pretty good mood. Not sure if I am going to give it to him or burn it out back Guess it depends on my mood I just know he is going to do the usual even though I said not to. I hate when he just acts like everything is normal..makes me want to vomit

Good thing is its my little sisters 17th bday. I am taking her to lunch and a spa to get our eyelashes permed and tinted!

Honestly I can't wait for this holiday to be over, I just want to bust out with a BULL $ HIT every time I pass by a Damn jewelry store or watch a valentines commercial. Not looking forward to it. Never knew how this whole experience would impact so much in my life. Kinda like New Years and how I just know this year is going to suck, so I wasn't drinking to celebrate. .. it was more of a suck it up and get it over with shots...

CantLoseHope posted 2/13/2014 20:31 PM

working, working, working,/...... and after work whatever I can do to keep my mind off of it.

StillLivin posted 2/13/2014 20:55 PM

He is breathing. Enough said.

But, I'm sure Shrek is getting him something nice and taking it back to their luurrrve nest.

ETA: D can not come soon enough.

[This message edited by StillLivin at 8:56 PM, February 13th (Thursday)]

dreamlife posted 2/13/2014 20:57 PM

Nothing at all.

headdesk posted 2/13/2014 21:02 PM

I asked him to do nothing at all and I hope he sticks to it. We're doing well in R...just couldn't handle this sickly sweet holiday with all the shit going on.

Spelljean posted 2/13/2014 21:50 PM

I officially despise Valentines day.

Maybe next year I will like it.

beautytoashes5 posted 2/13/2014 23:06 PM

My 5 kids and I will make red cheese enchiladas, chocolate covered strawberries. I will enjoy the day with my beautiful children. I'll fake it till I make it.

MammaMia posted 2/14/2014 18:56 PM

H kept his promise and gave me nothing for Valentine's day. He got the same gift as well. No regrets...I wanted it that way. We are going to the movies tonight but not because it is Valantine's. We had planned to go and I was tired yesterday. Tomorrow is his birthday. I have not bought him anything. Our older son and his wife are taking us out to dinner. Other than that, no other plans.

Buckeye Wife posted 2/14/2014 19:20 PM

4 years out and reconciling with a H doing things right....and I will be glad when today is over. Still struggling with the idea that he cheated.

Sent him out so I don't have to look at him tonight. Netflix for me tonight.

Gajit posted 2/14/2014 19:58 PM

All he gets from me is my middle finger high in the air...oh, and crickets.

33years posted 2/14/2014 20:04 PM

I texted my sleeping husband after I had left for work, "Happy VD Sweetie"

Ivyivy posted 2/14/2014 20:09 PM

V-day was always a big deal because it is/was also WH's birthday. Unlike me, he likes to celebrate. This year, he has gone out of town (without warning to celebrate with twin brother (turning 50). I am home with my DS 11. Drink in hand, a few cupcakes for DS, best day ever.

NoMorDeceit posted 2/14/2014 20:40 PM

We are almost 5 years out and today has been a really nice day. We slept in this morning, went out to lunch and dinner and plan to go in the spa later on tonight.

It is about time that some holiday was not tainted by his affairs. I hope it is the beginning of many more.

Hang in there, it does get better.