My husband and I are trying to work through his ONS together, but a yesterday I was just feeling so exhausted and over it all and ambivalent toward my husband, I finally broke down and texted my dad about what happened. I didn't want to talk, because I was I was afraid I would just cry hysterically. (I am about 3 months out, and had decided not to tell anyone since we were working on R and did not want anyone to take sides or think differently of him, etc.)
My dad is my go-to person to talk me down from the ledge because he is so even keeled and reasonable. So I decided I should tell him so he could help me.
Well, after I texted him he said "blah blah blah I know how you feel, been there." Then he said we'd talk sometime soon when he's away from my mom (i'm not telling her) and I'm not around my husband.
A bit of back story, my dad was married for like 5 years before my mom came along. The story I heard growing up was that they lived in CO, he got a job in OK and on moving day she said "i'm not going" and they got divorced. No kids, never talked to her again.
My issue is that I don't know who he was talking about when he said he had "been there" and I don't want to know if my mom was unfaithful. My mom is an insufferable bitch and doesn't give two shits about my dad, so I could see it happening. But at the same time, I hate my mom SO much that I barely tolerate her for my kids' sake as it is, I don't think I could stand to be around her ever again if I found out something like that.
So should I tell my dad that if it has anything to do with my mom, I'd rather just not know? That we should just stick to my problems? I don't want to be rude, but I can't take hearing something like that I don't think.
What would you do?