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Newest Member: Tryntocope (50544)

User Topic: Finding out about a parent's infidelity
♀ 41711
Member # 41711
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, February 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My husband and I are trying to work through his ONS together, but a yesterday I was just feeling so exhausted and over it all and ambivalent toward my husband, I finally broke down and texted my dad about what happened. I didn't want to talk, because I was I was afraid I would just cry hysterically. (I am about 3 months out, and had decided not to tell anyone since we were working on R and did not want anyone to take sides or think differently of him, etc.)

My dad is my go-to person to talk me down from the ledge because he is so even keeled and reasonable. So I decided I should tell him so he could help me.

Well, after I texted him he said "blah blah blah I know how you feel, been there." Then he said we'd talk sometime soon when he's away from my mom (i'm not telling her) and I'm not around my husband.

A bit of back story, my dad was married for like 5 years before my mom came along. The story I heard growing up was that they lived in CO, he got a job in OK and on moving day she said "i'm not going" and they got divorced. No kids, never talked to her again.

My issue is that I don't know who he was talking about when he said he had "been there" and I don't want to know if my mom was unfaithful. My mom is an insufferable bitch and doesn't give two shits about my dad, so I could see it happening. But at the same time, I hate my mom SO much that I barely tolerate her for my kids' sake as it is, I don't think I could stand to be around her ever again if I found out something like that.

So should I tell my dad that if it has anything to do with my mom, I'd rather just not know? That we should just stick to my problems? I don't want to be rude, but I can't take hearing something like that I don't think.

What would you do?

BS: 26, SAHM
WH: 29. Together 10yrs, married 6
3 kids 3 and under
DDay 11/21/13 Husband had ONS Aug. 2013 while living across the country temporarily for work.

Posts: 88 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: United States
♀ 31528
Member # 31528
Red  Posted: 3:35 PM, February 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Please use the existing thread.

Posts: 42647 | Registered: Mar 2011
Topic Posts: 2

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