My son just moved out to another town, though he's 19 and worked nights so we only saw each other briefly at night anyway, and I miss him, but on the bright side, it's less mess around the house and he took his cat. So I now live alone again, which in itself, is okay.
Lately, outside of work and when I see my SO (we see each other every other week for the most part due to his 50/50 week on/week off custody schedule)I am perfectly content to stay home alone and do nothing. Well, I will do normal chores like dishes and laundry, but I can't seem to motivate myself to do projects, like organize my office, either.
I have a lot of friends I socialize with, that interaction has minimized greatly too. I talked to a girlfriend earlier this week and we discussed possible movie plans today, and honestly, I'd rather sit at home, maybe do some things around the house, I just don't feel like going through the "trouble" of making plans and going to a movie.
I've gained weight over this past year, the new job is more sedentary during the day than my old one, and I haven't really "exercised" regularly since September. I will exercise 1-2x per week, but half-heartedly, while I used to be really into it - 4-5x per week, running, kettlebell workouts, etc.
I've been reading about mindfulness, so I'm going to try to start some regular meditation gradually, see if that helps.
I don't feel incredibly sad or anything, just like I'm in a rut, lacking the motivation to get things going in my life. I'm not sure what to do - do I see a doctor or a therapist?
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
I am perfectly content to stay home alone and do nothing. Well, I will do normal chores like dishes and laundry, but I can't seem to motivate myself to do projects, like organize my office, either.
Sometimes I think we are too eager to label something. What you described sounds perfectly normal to me. People sometimes are motivated to clean up papers and other times are not. People sometimes want to socialize and other times do not.
Do you think you have a problem?
If it is bothering you, then force yourself to go to he movies and/or exercise.
Otherwise you could venture over to in March to Houston for "the party"
I'm going to focus on lots of sleep and self-care this week, and see if that helps. Just monitor it, and definitely get the exercise routing going again.
Thanks for the responses.
It's possible that your balance of neurotransmitters have shifted and you have less of the kind that get you motivated like dopamine and acetylcholine. I have noticed this too, and it makes a difference in a lot of kinds of motivations to be outgoing, to exercise, to socialize.
When I get like this I take some single form amino acids like tyrosine, phenylalanine, or glycerophosphocholine (GPC) to boost them up in a very gentle, non-addictive way. This is described in books like The Mood Cure by Julia Ross, or Anne Mathews Larson's book on dealing with depression naturally.
Food wise you have to make sure you get protein regularly throughout the day so you have a generally good supply of amino acids from the protein. Taking the single form amino acids on an empty stomach gives a more particular, definite tho subtle effect.
Omega 3 fats are important to ensure that the receptors for the neurotransmitters are working correctly. Fish, fish oil, pasture raised meats/eggs. If you have a healthy metabolism you can use plant based omega 3s from flax, chia seeds, walnuts. You have to convert plant based omega 3s into what your body can actually use so if you don't have a strong metabolism (diabetes for example) make sure you take animal based Omega 3s.
If you know of nutritionist that is educated in single form amino acid therapy and how to use food for improving moods then make an appointment and get this straightened out before it turns into real depression and you have to try an addictive medication.
I went through a really down period around the holidays, for obvious reasons. I couldn't get anything done, wasn't eating or sleeping right, and didn't even want to shower. My IC recommended increased activity (even when/ESPECIALLY when) I don't feel like it, and getting back to my regular 4-5 days a week gym routine.
I've been trying and I'm doing a little better, but like you I just can't seem to get back into the groove. Fun things present themselves, I'd rather just sit. Free time to get things accomplished around the house... Nah, I'd rather just sit. Anything more just feels like a hassle. I'm back to working out but not very motivated and only getting there 1-2 times a week. Like you said, I don't feel sad, or hopeless like I did in December, just not happy or motivated either.
The months after dday and the D was like riding whitewater rapids. At Christmas, I was drowning. Now I feel like I'm just floating around on a stagnant pool of water, going nowhere. I don't understand it either. "Almost depressed" is as good a term as any.
No advice for you... hoping to get some myself when I see my IC tomorrow. Just wanted you to know you're definitely not alone in feeling this way.
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you. ~ Alfred Adler
Letting go of the outcome is about the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. ~ LosferWords