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Joanh posted 2/19/2014 13:33 PM

Not sure what's going on, Realized this morning my drive is gone, woke yesterday mad at the world not really but the closest way to describe it. Feeling something and it made it hard to do anything. I didn't want to be around my kids cause I couldn't stop being sharp, didn't want to be with my friend cause I just didn't want to be social, and I couldn't even paint, made a disiaster of my island I am trying to do.

And I can still feel it today. I am forcing myself even to do this but I need something, I don't know what. My house is falling apart to its messy but I don't feel like cleaning it.

Can't sleep either, just uncomfortable, I don't get it. my insomnia has been for a long time so nothing new, just getting worse.

I just don't get it. I was doing good. I felt OK. I was doing projects. keeping up.

Depression? I am just tired of feeling like nothing.

I know its a matter of getting up and doing.... but what the hell got me back here again.

I know my BH and haven't been able to talk much , he's training another worker so is up late and funny hours but, I don't know . feels like how we use to be, minimal talking, but on the other hand he tells me, and he calls me.

Maybe I am to dependent on him, maybe old fears, I'd say maybe I don't like being by myself, but on the other hand I don't want to be around anyone either.

I am suppose to make some cookies or muffins for brownie bake sale this weekend, and I am having a hard time to get up and do that. It all seems like so much work.

I know this will pass but man I am so flippn tired of being this way. Its not new even preA's this would happen.

just needed to talk. Thanks

Sparkle0504 posted 2/19/2014 15:19 PM


Sounds like depression to me. I had a break down 11 years ago and the best way to describe it is paralysing. Please see your doctor, talk to someone, it's absolutely beatable.

With all that's been going on with my SAWH, I've felt myself sliding that way again recently. Now seeing a good IC and it's helping.

Thinking of you.

silentscream13 posted 2/19/2014 15:45 PM


As I have been going through the same thing, my IC said that it could be your mind and body need a break from the emotional pain.

If it lasts for longer than a week or two, it may be depression and you should talk to your doctor.

My WH has been having bouts with depression recently and finds it helpful to talk to me. Yes, there are times during this whole mess when I do not want to hear about his feelings. However, when it comes to feelings of depression, I am receptive and supportive. Perhaps your BS would be as well.

Please take care of yourself and sending many hugs.

[This message edited by silentscream13 at 6:35 PM, February 19th (Wednesday)]

Sammy2013 posted 2/19/2014 16:10 PM

I agree with silentscream13. It's sounds like depression. I am in the middle of trying to fight my way out if one now. Same symptoms. My house is a wreck, but it all seems like so much. I'm exhausted all the time. Don't want to talk to anyone. I have made an appointment with my GP for meds at the recommendation of my IC.

Don't be too proud to ask for help. Depression is awful and it's ok to need help.


Joanh posted 2/20/2014 08:35 AM

Thanks for the replies. I have talked to my GP a few times over the years about this and none will prescribe they all figure stress. Go figure.

Little better today, Actually felt like getting up this morning.

Headed to see my BH out at his work taking the kids and going to a hotel with waterslides.

Maybe a change in scenery will help.

Thanks again.

Sparkle0504 posted 2/20/2014 08:47 AM

Well your GP doesn't sound very helpful:( But great to hear you're up and out in the fresh air:)

Been wondering how you're doing.

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