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ploddingon posted 2/19/2014 19:54 PM

It's been nearly a year since Ifinally caught him out. I had suspected for 18months but he would not admit it. He nearly drove me insane with his lies. He left our daughter alone when I was working nights to be with her, some things are unforgivable. I told her she could have him, her husband lied and cheated and now she had done this to me. But after two years of lies and pain (the way he treated me was appalling, he said he wanted me to hate him) he decided he loved me , couldn't live without me. I have been with him for 27years more than half my life and I took him back but, 4 months later caught him texting her and phoning her. I have no strength left, each day is an exercise in self-control and survival. I hate myself for needing him. He says he will let our house be repossessed, will make me and our daughters homeless if I end the marriage. The man I loved and have been completely faithful to has turned into a bullying, controlling monster all because of a girl young enough to be his daughter. I am destroyed but each day I gather the remnents of me and survive for my beautiful girls.

lastdance posted 2/19/2014 20:32 PM

take care of yourself----contact a lawyer so that you can find out what your rights are---get yourself tested for std or other diseases----why did you take him back---once a cheater always a cheater---the reason he came back is because he needs money to spend on her and it is cheaper to be at home---this man is abusive---you do not need him----you could be on your own and you will make it---do not let this man step all over you----you need to move on and allow yourself the opportunity of meeting a real man this second time around----do not let him make you feel fear---that is mental abuse---go to chump lady .com---stand proud and throw his ass out the door---who needs his cheating ways ----be a good role model for your daughter so she does not think being abused is normal for woman to put up with

Aceofbase posted 2/19/2014 20:52 PM

You need to be strong and ready to move on without him. Start getting stronger by doing the 180. You must start doing this ASAP. Even if you slip up go back to the 180. It will not be easy at first and be ready for the roller coaster of emotions.

Breezy150 posted 2/19/2014 21:13 PM

I agree 180 and lawyer, the threats only work if they are real, a lawyer will let you know exactly what your rights are.
So sorry you are going through this.