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STBX is on deployment since January and while he's overseas having the time of my life with his bitch, I am packing my stuff and getting ready to move to a different state in a week. ( with my son and 2dogs). Going through our stuff and finding old pictures and letters just made me feel worse again for the past 3 days that I found myself crying and just hurting again. I know it's only been 7 months since dday and it just sucks that the pain still hits me....And I guess with all the stress from the move while working full time and caring for my 2yr old and my dogs... I'm just tired physically, and emotionally and I just want all of these to be over. I'm just tired of feeling this way...

(((HUGS)))

Do you have anyone who can come over & help you? Or at least keep you company while you pack?

I think you feel this way because you're exhausted from being strong for so long. Put another way, you're human and are going through a terrible trial. I'm sorry.

Tara,

Even a mother's helper to watch the toddler would help! Packing is hard enough without a little one. And if it were me, I don't think I would dig too deep in the memories. Pack them up in boxes, labeled, and you can open them when you are stronger. Or you never have to open them.

I'm very lucky to have a few good friends who knows my story and they've been very helpful with the move. ( from watching my son for a few hours so I can run errands to offering to cook us dinner since I'm busy doing stuff around the house) I'm also moving closer to my 2 sisters and that would be good for my son so he can grow up with his cousins.

STBX didn't do shit before he left. He just packed his bags and left for deployment. He left a lot of his old stuff that I already got rid of ( sold them on craigslist and donated them. I guess he was expecting me to change my mind about the move but nope... Got a new job waiting, lease for the house has been signed and scheduled to move next Wednesday.... Sigh... I can't wait for next Thursday to come and just start anew....

[This message edited by tara1110 at 8:51 PM, February 19th (Wednesday)]

From one milspouse to another....WOOOOHOOO! Glad you have a job and are moving close to family ....(((tara1110)))

((tara)) I honestly think you're holding up remarkably well with raising a toddler, working F/T, a pet AND a move on top of the marital ickiness. And to me, 7 months in isn't 'that' long so know you are normal.

I'm a year out and far from normal. I'm really hoping that this move helps you heal. Maybe being in a new space, new job, etc. will help you heal from all the toxicity of your old life.