(((Jls0320)))
You are totally normal. I know the pain you are in personally.
You are 6 months out. I am 19 months out.
Breath.
If you can distract yourself with something, do it . I like nature....so I get with nature. Puzzles, reading, prayer....all help too.
If you can't distract....don't beat yourself up over that fact. You just experienced traumatic level pain. If you don't have PTSD, you most likely have PTSD-like symptoms. One symptom is obsessive thoughts. Another is black and white thinking. You are normal but you are needing healing.
IC is a great option.... Did it for a year.
Real life support....a must.
Journal.
Just a few that worked for me.
We are not equipped to handle traumatic events all on our own, nor does God expect us too.
Post often. Great, M-friendly support here.
You will have more "why the hell did I miss that?!?!" As you explore your past.
Summer my wife started her affair.....was the summer I had anxiety issues. 'Course, since in my mind my wife would never chose adultery....I neve considered that to be the source for my anxiety. So I searched in vane, with a therapist (wife by my side), for "my issues".
NOW I see plenty of clues I was formerly blind too.
.....the clarity of hindsight.
Keep the faith.
Peace be with you.
ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not yet incurred.