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Newest Member: debsous (61846)

User Topic: legal limbo/score one for me
♀ 42510
Member # 42510
Default  Posted: 12:10 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Before anyone rolls their eyes at me, let me just say that I'm living in legal limbo. I cannot kick him out, and he didn't kick me out, therefore I have to be "roommates" with my STBXH. I have my attorney working on this. As everyone knows, these things take time.

This morning I got up, made enough coffee for myself and went for my walk with my friend. When I got back, I was in my room getting ready for today's plans. STBXH tracks me down, and presents me with the used coffee grounds and says "Shit like this doesn't help." I asked what he was talking about and he pointed out that I only made enough coffee for myself (coffee was our thing, and we always made coffee for each other in the past). I burst out with "You fired me, remember? I don't have to take care of you because we're roommates now. I got fired." I then turned and walked in the master bath. He walked off without saying a word. When I walked out the door for the rest of my plans today, he didn't have anything to say and I heard the coffee grinder working!!! Score one for me.

Thank you Skan, for pointing out on one of my previous threads that I was fired, and that I had those words in my mind to present to him. I would PM you, but can't yet. Again, thank you for pointing that out. Having phrases like that helped me out today.

"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

Posts: 296 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Kansas
♀ 33822
Member # 33822
Default  Posted: 12:36 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good job Leia!

My EXWH: 6 month EA in 2010 OW 1

2 year Sexting/PA 2012-2014 OW2

I divorced him in May 2014

Posts: 442 | Registered: Nov 2011
♀ 24961
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 2:02 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It feels good, doesn't it? It's nice when we realize we don't have to do everything for someone that doesn't show us any respect. Good for you, that's a big step!

BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.

Posts: 5921 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good for you for standing your ground. It's fascinating that he thought you would still make coffee for him. Wonder how he'll take it when you don't do his laundry anymore?

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 41961
Member # 41961
Default  Posted: 8:27 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

NG -

I am chuckling at this. I have spent quite a bit of time lately analyzing the balance of "chores" at home between WH and I. Laundry is big. He just complained that I was all caught up with washing but his running gear didn't get done... He didn't get t out of the plastic bag or take it down to washer --- what will he do when his washer lady doesn't wash it either?? Ask mom? Hahahaha. The only thing I can think of that he does that I will really miss is walking the dogs at 430am.

BS: Me 47 WH: 54 Kids: 17, 19, 21, 32 DD: every yr Ow: tons Status: fed-up. A woman should never invest in a relationship she wouldn't want for her daughter, nor should she allow any man to treat her in a way she would scold her son for

Posts: 423 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Midwest
♀ 35812
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Leia, I am sitting here, listening to "Jar of Hearts," and having a really good chuckle at your outburst! Way to GO, girl! You just keep your sassy self going for that divorce eyes on the goal!

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 10182 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
♀ 42510
Member # 42510
Default  Posted: 10:08 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just tanked the sassy-ness of this morning. I was pissed because he changed the itunes password and I've just lost all of my playlists. I'm not tech-y enough to figure out how to transfer it to me. Then I picked a fight about his schedule. He honestly thinks I'm going to let him have the kids every other week during the school year after the shit he has pulled. He also said that if I couldn't pick up the kids after school while he is working in town (he usually travels) then he will make other arrangements. What other arrangements!?! I'm the stay-at-home-mom who knows everyone!!!

I know I've collected evidence, and that I'm going to come out the better for this divorce, but right now, it is like hitting my head against a brick wall. I let the emotions run amok and keep insisting he email me his schedule--which he won't do. That, and not knowing whether I'll get to stay in this house with the kids or not. I know the motions have been filed in court, but I'm sick and tired of him being around. He's walking around like he is in a power position and I feel so powerless in this moment. I know I have power, and I know how to wield it. I just can't do anything this minute.

"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

Posts: 296 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Kansas
Topic Posts: 7

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