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I'm so embarrassed-D W I

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Sad in AZ posted 2/23/2014 03:57 AM

I was arrested for DWI tonight. I need help--other than not ever drinking again help--I need legal advice. How do I go about finding an attorney? What kind of trouble am I looking at.

I had a blow out; hit the guard rail. My car is undrivable. I blew a 1.0 (0.8 is the legal limit.)

What the fuck have I done to myself?? I don't need hugs; I need advice. I'm going to call my brother, the police office, later on this morning, but I need to be scared straight NOW! Any information would be greatly appreciated.

I am an idiot.

Leia posted 2/23/2014 04:59 AM

My divorce attorney's office also advertises that they do DWIs. Start with attorney's that you know and go from there.

Catwoman posted 2/23/2014 05:35 AM

Your brother is going to be a good place to get advice. As an LEO, he would know the attorneys who are successful at defending these charges.


clba317 posted 2/23/2014 06:21 AM

I'll pm you the name of an attorney that my police officer ex mentioned after taking a police class from him. He wrote a book on dwi defense in NY.

[This message edited by clba317 at 6:22 AM, February 23rd (Sunday)]

authenticnow posted 2/23/2014 06:45 AM


I know you don't want hugs but I wanted to give you one. (((((((SadinAZ)))))

suckstobeme posted 2/23/2014 07:32 AM

Oh no! I hope you are not hurt and am glad that no one else was involved.

You need a good attorney who regularly handles DWI cases in the local courts near you. The accident complicates things. If you had gotten pulled for rolling through a stop sign or hugging the white line and blew a 1.0, there would have been a good chance of pleading down to the lesser included offense, which is driving while impaired. A local attorney will know the prosecutors, judges, and the plea policies of the office when an accident is involved.

It may also help if this is a first offense and there is an opportunity to go to alcohol related counseling or some other type of program.

The main thing is that no one was hurt and that it was scary enough that this won't ever happen again.

ajsmom posted 2/23/2014 07:33 AM

First off, glad you're OK.

I agree, your brother will be the best source for a good attorney.

Let's break this down. First offense, right? Not that you'll get a slap on the wrist, but from my experience with my X, first offenses are handled way differently than repeat offenses. You could probably Google minimum charges in NY. The big thing is how they categorize it - i.e., misdemeanor vs. felony.

There will probably be added charges for the damage to property. You may also have to pay for the guardrail.

ETA: Get the best lawyer you can afford. You'd be amazed at what they can do behind the scenes.

Here are some hugs anyway.



[This message edited by ajsmom at 7:35 AM, February 23rd (Sunday)]

cayc posted 2/23/2014 07:54 AM


I second all the advice re: the attorney. Please don't panic, it's going to be okay. These things happen and we all know it wasn't intentional. I'm glad you weren't hurt.

tesla posted 2/23/2014 08:11 AM

I have no advice. Just wanted to say that I'm glad that you are not hurt.

Chrysalis123 posted 2/23/2014 08:19 AM


It will be OK.

Sad in AZ posted 2/23/2014 08:33 AM

clba gave me a referral,and I've spoken to two of the attorneys. I'll probably go the plea bargain route and get a conditional license. I don't know where I'll get the money, but it has to be done. I'm so desperately embarrassed.

wildbananas posted 2/23/2014 09:29 AM

No advice here either but wanted to say I'm so glad you're okay, Sazzy.

deeplysad posted 2/23/2014 10:16 AM

The main thing is that you're okay. Somehow the rest of it will work itself out.


Dark Inertia posted 2/23/2014 13:58 PM

My mother and brother both have been arrested for DWIs. My mom, if I recall correctly, had to take some driving courses, and the second time she ended up spending the night in jail. She has been in at least one accident such as your own where she drove into someone's fence. However, she is very savvy with money, and just paid out of pocket for the damages. This was over a decade ago. I am grateful that she no longer drinks the way she used to, because it would terrify me whenever she would drive.

My idiot brother was arrested and kept in jail for a bit because he was driving while intoxicated and had warrants out for unpaid tickets. He married his girlfriend and straightened up.

On an unrelated note, I teased them both for their arrests once and they chided me, and said that I shouldn't be so smug... a month later I was arrested for an unpaid speeding ticket. I remember the humiliation of that quite well.

Is this the first time?

How often do you drink, btw?

[This message edited by Dark Inertia at 2:00 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)]

Lionne posted 2/23/2014 14:04 PM

In NJ first offense is 3 mos to 18 mos with no license, hefty fees, driver's classes, installation of a monitoring device after the license is reinstated. It is dependent on the level of alcohol when tested and amount of property damage if any.

If you get off with a provisional license in NY, that's light.

So glad no one was hurt.

BAB61 posted 2/23/2014 14:14 PM

NY is known for being hard-assed about DUI/DWI .. so the attorney route is your best bet.

Were you at a bar or a friend's house before the accident?

Start now with an AA meeting, so when you do go to court you can say "I'm being proactive, I'm attending AA" May help lessen your fine.

Good luck ..

FaithFool posted 2/23/2014 14:17 PM

(((Saz))) I'm so sorry to hear this, very glad nobody was seriously hurt.

Hard lessons.

Jrazz posted 2/23/2014 14:47 PM

I'm sorry I have no advice. I'm really glad you're ok. I just want to gently suggest that you not beat yourself up throughout this process. As we've advised countless others, committing to learn from this is the path out. It's going to be hard, but you have the right attitude about wanting to be scared straight. Something tells me you're never going to go through this again.


Sad in AZ posted 2/23/2014 15:03 PM

As far as drinking is concerned, I sometimes have a drink before I go to bed since I started working nights; the OTC sleep meds make me foggy for an entire day afterward. I've been experimenting with lower doses, but I'm still not there yet.

I may go out to eat once every two weeks and have 1 1/2 beers; that's my limit--until last night. I made a very bad decision. I went to see a band that I like, but I didn't read the advert well. I got to the bar at 8 and the band didn't start until 10. I had never been to this bar before, and it was in an unfamiliar town. After I ordered my first beer, I saw a sign that said $20 minimum for credit cards--I never carry cash. I should have just laid down the $20 and gone home, but I figured I'd be there for at least 3-4 hours and I should be able to handle the beers; obviously not.

I will talk to the atty tomorrow about AA. I'm not a fan of 12-step programs, but if it helps my case, I'd do it. I don't need an alcohol intervention; I need a life intervention. I've been making poor choices lately.

PurpleRose posted 2/23/2014 15:27 PM

Admitting there is a problem is the first step, so I will say that is good to see. I am so glad you didn't hurt an innocent driver (or yourself) - people who drive drunk don't do so with the intentions of hurting anyone but all too often that is the result.

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