Just putting this out there to get it off my chest. I got my first mediation session tomorrow. I met with the OMBW today. She gave me a LOT more information that she found out during her divorce proceedings and testimony from subpeonaed witnesses.
Wow, STBXW she had a lesbain encounter and openly expressed to her "new" friends a crush with that woman. She had reconnected with an old male highschool flame on FB. She had flirted with other H's of friends. She flirted with a recently divorced man, who was so disturbed by this encounter that he contacted his ex-wife about it and she advised him to stay away from STBXW because, yes, she knows STBXW is married. She flirted with so many other people, even men in my boys' cubscout pack, boyscout troop. She essesntially isolated just about every couple friend we have from herself, save one, with her disgusting behavior. I realize now that they have been slowly reaching out to me over the past several months.
Hey, I'm good. I'm ditching her ass anyway. But holy shit...I didn't know the extent of her disgusting behavior.
The good thing to come out of this is now I understand all those subtle acts of empathy and sympathy I've been getting from all those touched by her destructive behavior. It's hard to describe other than they treat you nicer than you expected. They include you more, while excluding the "repulsive" one. I've kept my mouth shut, stayed consistent as a father to my two wonderful boys, and never once tried involving other people into my marraige problems, my drama. It is now making sense. They have all suffered through her constructed narrative she made about our marriage and about me. My actions (or lack thereof) have proven her words wrong. They were sublty telling me that they know the truth. They have my back. This was quite eye-opening, and comforting today.