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Newest Member: Jojo88 (61157)

User Topic: The Parent Trap
♀ 40115
Member # 40115
Sad  Posted: 11:54 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So DS8 came home from his weekend with STBXH and wanted to watch a movie with me in my room. Fine. He puts the movie in and its the original "Parent Trap." Then he starts asking me what a parent trap is. How do you build one. Is it a real trap or not. I ended up telling him to choose another movie, that one makes me sad.

So tonight I had a heart to heart with him, explaining the Mommy and Daddy are NOT getting back together. Parent traps do not work in real life. I said, "When people get married they make promises to each other. Daddy broke his promises to me, and it really hurt my feelings." Then DS8 wants to know what promises. I was caught off guard so I just kinda glossed over it and reiterated that we are not getting back together.

WTH. I used to love the original "Parent Trap". Now I'll probably never watch it again. Not because of the divorce issue, but because of my DS's heartbreak. FTG for getting us into this situation!!

One day
I'm gonna forget your name,
And one sweet day,
you're gonna drown in my lost pain. - "Sweet Sacrifice" by Evanescence

Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014

Posts: 3391 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
♂ 41294
Member # 41294
Default  Posted: 12:55 AM, February 25th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

FTG indeed.

When the movie "Instructions not included" came out (before D-Day, I had no idea what was going on yet) I went to see it. I really liked it because it's mainly about the love of a daddy for his daughter. I wanted DD8 to see it eventually (it's PG-13, so not in a few years), because with all the main character's flaws, he truly loves his daughter like nothing else, and appreciates every minute with her.

Now I don't know if I want her to see it, it has a high contention divorce and custody battle at the very core of the plot.

Hopefully by the time she's 13 we'll all be calm enough she'll be able to see it. But I can't anymore at least for now, too triggery.

Master of my Fate, Captain of my Soul.
XBH and healing. D final March 2016
Her: Doesn't matter anymore.
DS13 Severe SN. DD11 Awesome

Posts: 1012 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: California
♀ 3703
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 7:38 AM, February 25th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Don't let that asshole ruin a perfectly good movie. It doesn't really compare to your life anyway. Neither one of the parents had an affair, they just fought all the time. I would not consider it a triggery movie really.

Plus, who the hell would split up a pair of twins? And then not tell them that they had a twin sister? And then keep the kid from the other parent for 13 years? What kind of custody orders are those? Soooo unrealistic!

BW - 40
DD - 7 years old
D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

Posts: 5436 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
♀ 38735
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, February 25th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. I don't think if gloss over it in the future though. Tell him the truth, but spare the details. Just say that dad had a girlfriend while he was married and when you marry you promise not to do that. Make it simple, but don't sugarcoat it. I think kids need to know the truth.

(((Gemini71 & DS)))

BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 1268 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: AZ
♀ 16958
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 9:35 AM, February 25th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I remember wishing I could do something to get my parents to reconcile after I watched that movie. The hope passes. Reality sets in. Your poor DS. If he asks again just tell him you are not supposed to have a gf when you're married. That way he has a concrete reason and maybe it will help him realize how destructive that behavior is so he doesn't do it himself

Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!

Posts: 949 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
Topic Posts: 5

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