SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Well its been years since D-day, matter of fact many years. Been D for years as well, but as luck would have it the ties that bind still exist. After we D I got a notice of payment from the IRS claiming non payment of taxes for a home consulting business my XW had during our M. A business that I insisted she incorporate. Well me being the trusting dope at the time believed her when she said she did just that. Anyway they were demanding tens of thousands in payment from me because she had no means to pay at the time as she was unemployed and had no assets. Being we filed joint M I was responsible for the debt. After several pleas and claims that I was an unwitting party to her deception, they just wanted payment. I hired a lawyer to negotiate and we came to a settlement amount that took me a couple years to pay off. Figured that was a dead deal and water under the bridge. Well yesterday I open my mailbox and low and behold there is a notice of collection from the state for the last year we were M. They want $2,800.00 as well. So I called the attorney that negotiated the fist settlement and he said he only negotiated with the IRS not the state. He suggested I pay it because it would cost more in legal fees to contest it. Now the $2,800.00 is not going to kill me and I have the funds to pay. But I'm pissed off. When is enough, enough with this woman ? I'm tempted to call the XW and start some shit, but is it worth the hassle of starting a fight with her ? Things actually have become civil lately and I kind of like the peace I have gotten after many years of bickering and basically being harassed by her. I'll most likely pay it just to be rid of the hassle. But I'm angry all over again because of this woman's treachery. Her lies have been so far reaching and she basically walks away scott free all the time. Just when you think your out, they pull right back in. Thanks for the vent people.

Oh boy.

Years? Years? Fuck me I'd be pissed off too.

I'd pay it and never think of it again. It is a small price (on top of big prices already paid) for your freedom. Perhaps the universe thought you needed a reminder of what she is.

This HAS to end sometime, right. Let this be the end of it.

Don't let this suck you back in. Go and beat the shit out of something. Get it out of you. Then right back on your own path.

Stronger, I hope you have your documents from the IRS settlement. What you can try to do is negotiate with the state yourself. I've done this a couple of times and have been successful. Maybe your state will take the same per cent as you gave the IRS? Worth a shot.

Ugh. This is my biggest fear. When married, my Wxh and I had a partnership. He made it an LLC when I left. It's been 6 years, and he is virtually homeless. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop when they come looking for me.

I would definitely call the state and attempt to negotiate something. I would also let her know that this is still coming back to you. She needs to feel some of your pain. I realize that there is no remorse, but still.....

I would give her a piece of my mind and let her know that they are coming after you. However, you probably are stuck with the bill if she won't pay it. She probably knows about it, and doesn't care.

This sucks.

What Williesmom said, only take it to the state. Explain the situation. Depending on your state they're usually smaller offices with less staff that can get more "involved" in your situation than the IRS does. Hopefully, you live near your state capitol and you can contact one person in the correct department. It is a time suck, but I've found worth it....

Ugh I fear this. I look forward to the day that it's 7 years past my D so I can quit worrying about being auditing and having to fork over yet more money to fund xWHs life with Wife#4.

I wouldn't just roll over and pay. I'd see if you can organize something with the state. And rock the boat, ask your xWW to pay SOMETHING even if it's just a token amount of where she sends you $100 a month for the next year.