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careerlady (original poster member #16958) posted at 5:52 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
The Snake, who got progressively lousier at "special days" until I didn't get any gifts the last few years (we'd buy something together like trip and he'd say that's my gift 
) decided to get me a huge bouquet of flowers, a delicious flourless chocolate cake, and a cologne-soaked card. The card talked about how long we've known each other and also said, in part:
"Yes we've had our challenges and yes we've had our moments. Whatever challenges life brings us I sincerely hope we take the right lessons away from them for stronger bonds in the future. Life and its experiences can only get so much worse before it starts getting better"
He acts like stuff has just "happened" to us like cancers and family death rather than his deliberate and repetitive cheating! 
he's right about one thing - things have gotten so bad where I have taken on an active role in making things better, by getting rid of him!
He also posted a pic of the flowers he got me on Facebook and tagged me in the photo saying "guess who turned 21" (of course I'm like 36 now and was not flattered duh:)
And he "let slip" that he'd gotten a raise and that his boss makes 2million something a year like money is going to change my mind. He's so delusional if he thinks I'm going to let things just blow over this time. He can't even lower himself enough to admit what a POS he is, just puts everything on my family and his FOO issues. Such a shame.....
Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI
dmari ( member #37215) posted at 6:48 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
First of all, HaPpY bIrThDaY!! 
and 
with snake's "gifts"!
Softcentre ( member #39166) posted at 7:00 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
On the plus side....higher SS
He really does think a lot of himself doesn't he? And clearly wants everyone else to, as well.
I'd be tempted to post a pic of the flowers on FB saying "the flowers look nice, but they smell of bullsh*t"....except WHY WERE YOU ON HIS FB PAGE?
Me: BW
Him: XWH
2 Children
Finally reached indifference & looking forward to my new beginning
GotPlayed ( member #41294) posted at 8:03 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
Happy Birthday!
My last birthday sucked too. At least you got something. During mine, we weren't on speaking terms (5d after S decision). She got me a cake with DD8 and did a kid style happy birthday surprise, but mostly because DD8 insisted. It was the most awkward birthday I've ever had. She left quickly after, leaving me to tea party with my daughter.
They do act like it "just happened" and like we're the ones in the wrong for being mad. It's insane. However when you think about it, the 180 is for us to heal, and so we're not mad. We're heading for D, might as well be happy. Freedom can't be too far ahead!
By being mad at them we give them more power.
Don't give him more power. Do however note he has more money coming in now and let your L know to ask for new pay stubs. 
Master of my Fate, Captain of my Soul.
XBH and healing. D final March 2016
Her: Doesn't matter anymore.
DS13 Severe SN. DD11 Awesome
jemimapd ( member #37895) posted at 8:18 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
Happy Birthday!!!
I know.
It just happened.
People make mistakes.
No one's perfect.
Everyone has ups and downs.
It just happened.
No marriage is perfect.
Maybe it's a good thing this happened.
Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.
BAB61 ( member #41181) posted at 2:54 AM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
ohhhh, he complimented you, and got you flowers .... you should be sooooooo happy ... but wait ... what? you really want a D???? awwwwww poor Snakey poo ...
Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.
careerlady (original poster member #16958) posted at 7:32 AM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
Thanks guys!
Dmari- get it wasn't all bad. I enjoyed that cake just like his V Day chocolates
Softcentre - I wasn't really on his page, I just got a notice I was tagged in a photo and there it was
GotPlayed - I'm not mad. Sadly I just get little surges of anger and they hardly last. Part of the reason I forgive too much I'm going to let the pay thing go since I'm trying for default and have no confirmation
Jeminapd - exactly!!!!
BAB61 - yup he's about to be a big ole victim of the meanie wife. The nanny hasn't been told yet and she gushed over my huge flowers. Sigh.
Oh the best part is he left the big box the flowers came in on the floor for me to dispose of (he left town today) and made some crab that night and left me the dirty pot. Thanks... 
Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI
Softcentre ( member #39166) posted at 7:50 AM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
Hope you did have a fab birthday
I'm so glad you weren't on his FB page, if you block him then you won't see photos at all.
Aw, but he's soooo precious isn't he? So very special! He didn't just gift you flowers, he gifted you the rubbish and the washing up too. Just lovely! (sarcasm)
I'm so glad that his arsewipery makes it easier to detach.
BTW - Tell the nanny, in fact,give her the flowers if she likes them so much. Now is the perfect time. She needs to know what an arsewipe he is, before he tries to win her over...which he is bound to try because, you know, he can't stand people not liking him.
Me: BW
Him: XWH
2 Children
Finally reached indifference & looking forward to my new beginning
GingerAle ( member #33822) posted at 2:55 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
and a cologne-soaked card
Eeeeeewwwwww!
Hey, he is loaded now $$$$... can't you just take on life's challenges with him, and learn and bond as one?
Hope you had a great day careerlady 
My EXWH: 6 month EA in 2010 OW 1
2 year Sexting/PA 2012-2014 OW2
I divorced him in May 2014
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 5:37 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
How romantic. How can you resist?
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
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