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willowiris (original poster member #5372) posted at 11:52 PM on Friday, February 28th, 2014
Hi all-
I'm doing OK. I don't come here as much anymore because I guess you could say I survived infidelity. Seven years post divorce, one would hope.
My life is crazy busy. I work full time in a cancer clinic. I go to school part time as a nursing student. I was diagnosed with ADHD, so school is a tough row to hoe, but I'm doing OK.
Sadly, my mom has cancer, and this is a battle she is going to lose. She is stage IV. She has fought long and hard for about a year and a half, and failed multiple lines of drug therapy. all that's left is to try to shrink the tumor and make her comfortable. This is so hard and sad and painful. Yet, I see it every day where I work.
My oldest will graduate from high school in the spring, and I also have a high school freshman and my sweet 4th grader.
I am doing as well as I can be doing for having an ill family member. I am not dating anyone special, though I do date some. I just don't care anymore. I can't deal with anyone else's bullshit.
So there's an update. Wish it were happier. I have missed you all and I see some of you on FB. 
D-day 09/2004
Filed for divorce 9/2006
We accept the love we think we deserve. "The Perks of Being a Wallflower."
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 11:58 PM on Friday, February 28th, 2014
Oh, so many (((hugs)))!!
I am sorry that your right now is such a battle. You have survived before and you will again. I remember you from my very earliest days here. You were a bright spot for me then.
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
exhausted lady ( member #30217) posted at 2:35 AM on Saturday, March 1st, 2014
(((willow)))
So good to hear from you, but I'm sorry you're dealing with the situation with your mom. It's gonna be tough.
Anyway, just wanted to say "hi" and give you a hug. Thank you for letting us know that you're trudging onward and upward! 
Sometimes the hardest part of finally seeing through someone is accepting what you see...
God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to
change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
-Reinhold Neibuhr
hexed ( member #19258) posted at 2:40 AM on Saturday, March 1st, 2014
I'm so sorry for your challenges but so glad you posted an update.
Wishing you many simpler days ahead
But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler
InnerLight ( member #19946) posted at 3:40 AM on Saturday, March 1st, 2014
Big hugs willow I!!!
Sorry to hear re yr mom.
Glad you updated us.
BS, 64 yearsD-day 6-2-08D after 20 years together
The journey from Armageddon to Amazing Life happens one step at a time. Don't ever give up!
inconnu ( member #24518) posted at 4:55 PM on Saturday, March 1st, 2014
(((willow))) I remember when I first ventured into NB, back when I was figuring out I was in false R, and trying desperately to see what the future would be like if I ended up divorced, I'd read your threads and think "it's do-able. I can survive infidelity and divorce." You've always given a very realistic view on life after divorce, but your strength and determination come shining through, too.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom.
PS. I still think you should write a book about your online dating experiences. You write very well, and put a very comedic spin on your encounters. 
There is no joy without gratitude. - Brené Brown
persevere ( member #31468) posted at 10:18 PM on Saturday, March 1st, 2014
((willow)) Great to hear from you, positive thoughts and energy are sent your way as well as strength, you are dealing with a lot. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom.
[This message edited by persevere at 4:18 PM, March 1st (Saturday)]
DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
ajsmom ( member #17460) posted at 4:14 PM on Sunday, March 2nd, 2014
So sorry about your mom, willow.
I'm sure even though you see this life everyday it's not easy when it's someone you love.
The fact that you are such a highly educated advocate for her is wonderful.
Hugs to your family.
AJ's MOM
Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.
"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
One AMAZING DS - 34
wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 4:43 PM on Sunday, March 2nd, 2014
Hey willow girl...nice to see you.
I'm sorry about your mama... I know how hard that is.
Hugs to you and yours.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
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