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Anniversary today

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gypsybird87 posted 3/3/2014 14:50 PM

Six years ago today I said "I do" to a man I never really knew. I was so happy. I thought I'd found my forever, finally. I had no idea I was committing my life to someone who would turn out to be the worst person I've ever met.

One year ago we "celebrated" with a very awkward and non-romantic dinner date. He was so distant and cold, well into his affair and no doubt wishing he was anywhere else. I knew we were having problems but I had no idea what was truly going on.

This year I'm single. Alone, yes. But I also don't have all the nagging doubt and misery I was battling on this day last year. Feeling like the marriage was dying and being totally helpless to save it. This year its cut and dry. The marriage is dead. Buried. Grass has grown back over the gravesite and it's not a fresh, gaping wound anymore.

I'm glad to get another "first" behind me. First Valentines and first birthday last month sucked. This is actually a piece of cake compared to that double-whammy.

The rest of the day is full. I'm working now and this evening (like most Mondays) I'm doing two classes at the gym with some friends: strength training followed by Zumba. Of course, the day ain't over yet...but so far I think I'm doing okay.

caregiver9000 posted 3/3/2014 14:54 PM

(((gypsybird)))

I am glad you think you are ok. I think you are awesome!

Happy "day to celebrate YOU."

Pass posted 3/3/2014 14:59 PM

The firsts all suck. Any okay that you think you are doing on those days is a major victory.

norabird posted 3/3/2014 15:01 PM

I'm so happy for you. I can't wait for that grass to start growing on my end!!

Nature_Girl posted 3/3/2014 15:30 PM

Happy Zumba hip rotations, Baby!

sunsetslost posted 3/3/2014 15:42 PM

(((gypsy)))

gypsybird87 posted 3/3/2014 16:35 PM

Thanks all.

Happy Zumba hip rotations, Baby!

Zumba is definitely one of the best anti-depressants I've found!

Duskpearl posted 3/23/2014 03:30 AM

My WH bday is the same day as your anniversary! He & the OW went away for the weekend as they did 2 weeks before that to celebrate Valebtine's Day! Ironically, he never cared much about celebrating his bday & thought bdays were for kids. And he was never that big on Valentine's Day either & after 12 years together it wasn't even acknowledged in the later years!

Our last anniversary was spent in NY (10 yrs last Nov), it was also strained as 2 weeks prior I found some emails to a co worker. It was way too late to cancel the trip. Within the first week of arriving home it was over & he practically moved right in with the she bloke OW!

Like you I thought I married the man I would be with for life. We were so happy & he loved me so much. But something changed inside him & I no longer know who he is.

I'm alone also but have to remind myself that towards the end I was actually alone when I was with him....

(((hugs)))

Caretaker1 posted 3/23/2014 03:54 AM

Approaching first anti versary first also. I care but don't. I too was alone in a marriage. I too had a weak 10 year anniversary where I planned fun things and she took little effort to enjoy the milestone. She moved on with another divorcee and Disney dad playing house. Wishing some days they get engaged and others just shaking my head over a lifetime of shared custody. Many cluster b and bipolar traits too much rage walking on eggshells.

It's drama each week and bullying. Doing my best to keep minimum contact.

Vulcanized posted 3/23/2014 16:12 PM

(((gypsy)))

The first one is really rough. The first one after the D wasn't as rough, oddly.

Glad you have a full & fun day planned for yourself.

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