SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Well, this week has been nervewrecking... for a lot of reasons. Just knowing my boss is frustrated with me has bothered me and one of my coworkers has been trying to nitpick at me but luckily I have responded to all of her emails with professionalism, accuracy, and completeness as well as tactfulness. I am watching my back very carefully now.

Today I received an email from my boss asking me to do a new calculation and sent me some financials. I took this as a challenge and perhaps a test.....a test to see if I would try to come to her to ask questions without trying to tackle it on my own. I DID NOT. I printed off loan documents, covenants, pulled up my calc spreadsheet and made the adjustments and even had backup reasons for why certain numbers were or were not included in my calculation and when certain calculations would be coming due but weren't due at this time.

She seemed pleased with the result. I did it right. And, I did it all by myself!!!!

Yesterday I had to leave at 3pm for a dental consultation and had been banging my head against the wall for about a day on this one huge complicated reconciliation that I do every month and figured it out at the last minute...and stayed until I printed out all my reports and turned them into my boss on my way out the door.

I know one thing. I'm not going down without a fight. I've cut down on personal talk and have just been keeping it strictly business unless otherwise engaged. And, I've been working hard to figure out problems on my own. (I still have been keeping my eyes peeled on the job boards though...just to be safe) You never know. But, I'm proud to report that I think I'm making a good effort...and plan to keep improving myself and prove to my boss that I am the kind of employee she wants to keep on her team!

I am so proud of you, Shelly! I've been wondering how you're doing.

Taking names and kicking asses, as expected.

Keep it up.

Well, I'm not going to let my guard down and I'm going to really concentrate on her constructive criticism and take it as a chance to grow and not take it personally like my old self would have. Nobody is perfect and everyone has room to improve themselves. This is just a chance to be a better me and a more productive employee. I can do this!

It's good to hear you're focused again.

Bit of caution - you post still smacks as a "Them against me" attitude.

You need to remember that your boss had valid concerns about your performance.

Try to look at this more humbly that you recognized the reasons behind what happened before and are taking the steps to make the improvements she's asked for.

Soldier on!

AJ's MOM

Have confidence, Shelly. I haven't been on the NB forum for a while, so I'm not sure what latest drama may have gotten you to this point, but you need to remember that you are a smart cookie.

I got part-way through the training to become a Certified General Accountant here in Ontario, before I found that I'd rather gouge my eyes out than become an accountant (personal preference, of course - eye-gouging sounds really fun!). However, before I quit, I realized that no buffoons are capable of becoming accountants.

You were able to become an accountant because of your intelligence and hard work. Keeping this job should be a piece of cake in comparison! You can do this!

Good job Shelley! You should be proud of yourself. You are using this opportunity for self growth which can only benefit you moving forward.

The new and improved beautiful Shellybeanz!!!!

Loud applause in the background.

Keep up the great work! You can rock this!

It's good to hear you're focused again.

Bit of caution - you post still smacks as a "Them against me" attitude.

You need to remember that your boss had valid concerns about your performance.

This.

Gently, your boss isn't going to throw a ticker tape parade for you when you finally do what you're being paid to do in the first place.

Staying focused, keeping your nose clean, and doing your job is basic job performance. Going above and beyond is what gets the pats on the back and the "atta girls" from the boss.

I actually wasn't referring to my boss when I was concerned about watching my back. I have a coworker that seems to be a brown-noser and has been looking for things to get me in trouble and I found out is a big gossip. I'm more concerned about making sure she has nothing to report about me to my boss. And, I'm making sure of that! I know my boss was just doing her job in pointing out my weaknesses and I'm thankful for the feedback.

Agreed. Performance at work is important, and you can learn to see it as a welcome distraction from this madness that is our current state of mind.

My D-Day is recent and my D is ongoing. Only recently have I been able to concentrate, and that's only more or less. Right now, I'm a shadow of what I was on D-Day-1day. I know it, and my boss knows it.

I'm the cofounder. The boss is the other cofounder. And while he has been incredibly wonderful throughout this ordeal, I can also sense his impatience at times - there's a lot of stuff to do, there's a lot of pressure driven by our business deadlines!

At that point I stop myself, look at the deadlines, and find a way to work extra hard. Because it is true, I'm not performing the same. My team needs me, and I'm failing them a bit. For perfectly valid reasons, but we still have those deadlines, and we still need to move fast. My team and my boss can understand, but the clients won't.

Losing my job would only make things worse for my family.

And in my case as a co-founder, the company going under because a co-founder couldn't get his stuff together would hurt more than just my family. It would hurt many families.

And I can't let my WW's path of destruction cross over to their families because of my negligence. That I do have control over that is entirely on me.