Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
I totally get this, dude. Weeks after I moved out, I was inviting The Princess to eat supper with us when she would pick up the boys on Sunday nights. We would have long phone conversations a few times a week. I MAY even have sent her a booty call via text once (luckily, she took great joy in shooting me down!).
All that happened, even though I had so much hate for her almost instantly after I moved out. I think a lot of it was just habit. This was the woman I was used to socializing, eating, and having sex with. I didn't know how to stop doing that.
I eventually got over all this stuff. She doesn't even get to take her shoes off in my apartment anymore - and I wouldn't screw her with YOUR dick.
Now, a year after moving out, I've decided I need to work on getting past the anger stage. I think it's important at this point - it may be slowing my healing process. But up until now, I needed the anger. It was a strong force in helping me to start healing.
You can do this. Find your inner rage machine. Don't bother raging at her - it won't do any good at all, and may make you look unstable when you start talking about things like custody - but use that rage to keep moving forward. And "forward" is any direction away from where she's standing.
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous