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callmecrazy (original poster member #38765) posted at 9:51 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
Now that we are speaking in truths, WH admits he has from day 1 tested and pushed boundaries kind of like a 2 year old. I asked why he married me if he wasnt really ready...he doesnt know. Either way, now that I look back at 7 years of me really just asking for his time and attention and his excuse for all the other negative things/women was the ego stroke, I realize I was never special to him. He says I am now and he wants to prove it, but Im beginning to feel that there may be too much water under that bridge and Ill drown if I go back there again. Just where Im at today realizing for 7 years I was trying to give him what he wanted and it wasnt enough. EVEN IF YOU ARE GIVEN A TOP STEAK, IT WONT SATISFY IF YOU WANT SPAM IN A CAN. 
MadeOfScars ( member #42231) posted at 10:44 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
It may not be what you want to hear, but you now have an opportunity to not make that 7 years into 8 years, 10 years, 20 years...you see what I'm saying. It is NOT your fault he is broken. You've shown you can uphold more than your end of the bargain, and you are special. Believe that, and believe that if your WH can't realize this, you have an opportunity to heal, and then find someone who will.
EVEN IF YOU ARE GIVEN A TOP STEAK, IT WONT SATISFY IF YOU WANT SPAM IN A CAN.
Exactly. You're too good for him, at least for who he is showing himself to be. If he wants spam, let him eat spam. You said you gave him what he wanted and it wasn't enough? I'd say it was plenty, and he just isn't able to appreciate it.
I'm sorry you're going through this, but know, I mean KNOW, that you are special. If you can get past this, whether it's R with your WH or not, there are many men who truly appreciate top steak and will never look at spam again. However this pans out, we have your back, and there is a brighter future ahead.
"Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t." - Steve Maraboli
Truly ( member #40715) posted at 11:24 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
You are special, so special.
Perhaps he's growing up and can finally appreciate how wonderful you are?
Of course, his arrival at adulthood may be too late for you.
((((((callmecrazy))))))
Strength
xxx
There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens
Pass ( member #38122) posted at 1:11 AM on Friday, March 14th, 2014
Perhaps he's growing up and can finally appreciate how wonderful you are?
Even if he is growing up, it doesn't happen overnight. He may be realizing that he is at risk of losing the lovely person he took for granted for years. That just means he's sad for the loss, it doesn't mean he will magically wake up ready to be a good husband.
Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.
Pass ( member #38122) posted at 2:56 AM on Friday, March 14th, 2014
Oops! I'm sorry. That was really harsh. You definitely deserve someone who realizes how wonderful you are - and if he has any sense, he'll become that person. Please be wary though.
Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.
callmecrazy (original poster member #38765) posted at 1:48 PM on Friday, March 14th, 2014
Pass, its okay I know what you mean. I have thought that too. Each time he makes more trouble he suddenly gets it blah blah same story different month/year.
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 3:19 PM on Friday, March 14th, 2014
It's so awful that we waste our amazing capacity for love on people who can't appreciate it and don't deserve it.
You are very, very special. Unfortunately your WH has been so entitled and immature that he can't see what in this world truly has value. If that can change (if) can only be known with lots and lots of time. The intention to change alone on his part isn't enough--actions, not words.
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