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Amazing quote I just read

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HFSSC posted 3/14/2014 08:56 AM

My marriage used to be a shiny, fancy house built on sand.

The sand shifted, as it does, and my shiny fancy marriage crumbled. All my beautiful things were strewn all over the ground. Everything I had and thought I loved was busted and broken. All gone. Everything gone. Nothing Whole Anymore. It was very sad. So sad.

18 months later my marriage is a teeny tiny shack. Itís not much to look at yet, nothing fancy, because weíve just started rebuilding. We havenít filled it up yet- because we are being really careful about what weíll allow in our space this time. Weíve got expert builders helping us and even so, itís slow going. We have to rest a lot. But weíre on solid ground this time. So no matter how long it takes us to rebuild- itís okay because weíre building something thatíll last. We are not shiny anymore but we are strong.

Tonight Iím grateful that my marriage fell the hell apart so Craig and I could rebuild it stronger and better and realer.

Broken is the beginning.

Just wow.

bionicgal posted 3/14/2014 08:59 AM

Broken is the beginning.

Certainly true in our case. Thanks for sharing.

lordhasaplan? posted 3/14/2014 09:01 AM

agree, very nice sentiment

Neverwudaguessed posted 3/14/2014 09:01 AM

LOVE IT! Thank you for sharing it with us...

Morhurt posted 3/14/2014 10:16 AM

AML04 posted 3/14/2014 11:29 AM

Love this!

eachdayisvictory posted 3/14/2014 12:16 PM

orchidsoul posted 3/20/2014 11:12 AM

Wonderful! Thanks for sharing

slater13 posted 3/20/2014 11:20 AM

I like the analogy but couldn't disagree any more with the conclusion. My marriage may be rebuilt. Parts of it may be improved. But let's be clear, it will never be BETTER.

It will always be stained and tainted. Am I supposed to thank my wife for fucking another dude for 3 years so that we had a chance to fix our marriage. Absurd.

karmahappens posted 3/20/2014 14:51 PM

That is awesome.

I believe it and am living in the same little shack.

I don't ever want shiny and pretty again.

I want real.

Thank you for posting it.

Jacobswife posted 3/20/2014 20:57 PM

OMGosh! I love this post! Thank you for sharing!!!

HFSSC posted 3/20/2014 21:07 PM

slater13, I'm sorry that this hit you in a negative way. That's the one thing that I've learned more than anything else on this journey...there is no one way that we heal, no one way that this is experienced. What works for me will not necessarily work for anyone else, but I am SO glad we have this place where we can share.

I think it must be really, really hard for a BS who felt completely content and happy in their pre-A M to be able to see R as anything "better" than before. For me and my H, things were never right. We looked flashy and pretty from the outside but never had a strong foundation. What we have today is exactly like the quote describes, only we have begun building a beautiful home where our little shack once stood. The foundation is strong, and true and pure. Do I wish we could have found our way here without all the pain? Absolutely. But I also know both of us well enough to know that was pretty unlikely to happen until we both felt enough pain to make the changes that needed to happen.

Peace and strength to all of us.

H

blakesteele posted 3/20/2014 21:28 PM

Spot on.....thanks for posting.

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