SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

JaneDeaux posted 3/15/2014 07:29 AM

WH and I are attempting to reconcile after his latest EA/PA. He has come a long way in terms of transparency and we are in MC. So why won't he have anything physical to do with me? I'm not talking about hysterical bonding. I mean a hug, a goodnight kiss., an arm around the waist. Hell I'd settle for a handshake! Is this normal?

devasted30 posted 3/15/2014 12:13 PM

Nothing about what is happening in our lives right now is "normal". Everyone handles infidelity differently. Perhaps your husband is feeling so much guilt, it's his way of punishing himself. Be open, ask him. You'll never know the answer unless you ask. Don't assume, ask. Being open and honest is the only way to handle these questions. Stay calm and talk. I know, easier said then done, but give it a try. It could be something completely off the map, something that you haven't thought of or it could be something as simple as guilt.

crazynot posted 3/15/2014 12:32 PM

Sorry, but in my opinion it's not a good sign. I had 6 months of coldness after he (temporarily) gave in and dumped OW...

FixYou71 posted 3/15/2014 15:49 PM

You really need to ask him then you can decide if you can believe what he's saying to you or if he's giving you the best possible answer to cover up for the truth. It sounds concerning.

IsthereEVERanend posted 3/15/2014 20:57 PM

I think it is entirely possible that he is simply afraid of you. That because of his guilt you might reject him or not want his touch. My fww told me that she did not want to push me too hard too fast. Actually, I craved her touch. What makes things doubly difficult is the fact she never has been a touchy feely person. So yeah, I understand something of where you are coming from.