SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

augustmarie posted 3/16/2014 00:53 AM

My ex fiancé was a cheater. Yeah I can pick them, now my husband is in that category. I was just thinking back about 7 years. I contacted her and told her he was engaged (he told me she was stalking him). I asked her to leave him alone. This chick sent my ex a revealing pic of herself from her work email. It happened to be a car dealership, so I sent the picture of her to her coworkers, I did a funny priceless thing. Cost of this shirt, cost of the hotel room, some dudes fiancé sending the revealing pic I sent to him to all my colleagues, priceless.

She texted him immediately saying she would never talk to him ever again. He showed that text to me all proud that he had broken contact with her for me and took credit for it. Only I knew the truth and it was awesome.

What have you done you aren't proud of or that you are proud of. I need a smile tonight,

MrsDoubtfire posted 3/16/2014 01:46 AM

Priceless!

Why do you see this as the worst thing you ever did?

In my eyes if a woman sends a man semi naked pictures of herself knowing he's not available then she's put herself out there already! The fact she did so on a work e mail just makes it worse too. Surely that's a sackable offence right there?

Worst thing I did? Not filing a complaint against OW at her workplace so she could be fired! Sex in a work environment on company time is just plain wrong.... unless you're a working girl!

I did text an ally of the A after from FWH's mobile pretending to be him saying what a mistake the A was and going into graphic detail about the OW in as nasty a way I could think of knowing full well she'd get to read that!

Do I think that's the worst thing I ever did? No way! Wearing socks with stilettos is a far worse 'crime' in my eyes (I only did it once but never again!)

Tearsoflove posted 3/16/2014 03:26 AM

Bobby socks can look quite adorable with heels. Think Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Now, if they were men's tube socks...yeah, that is the worst thing you've ever done. The horror!

MrsDoubtfire posted 3/16/2014 03:45 AM

Bobby socks can look quite adorable with heels. Think Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Now, if they were men's tube socks...yeah, that is the worst thing you've ever done. The horror!

See- I said it was bad!

DTERMINED2SURVIV posted 3/16/2014 07:28 AM

OMG!! (((AUGUSTMARIE))) I have literally contimplated doing the same thing, only the pic I found was NUDE! It was in his phone and it took EVERYTHING in me to not post it to his FB where he has 5,000 friends, and send it to ALL his contacts with a message saying..... "This is what happens when you send naked pictures to my Fiance". I chickended out, but boy I wanted too!! Dont be ashamed!!!

The worst thing I ever did was when my fws cheated on me with these 2 girls that were friends. One of them knew the other one was messing with him, the other one didnt. So I told the one that didnt know that her friend was messing with him too. They had been best friends since elementary school. Needless to say they dont even talk anymore! When I told her about her friend, she went and told her friends boyfriend of 4 years and they also broke up.

cantaccept posted 3/16/2014 07:49 AM

On dday#2, I found a text from new ow. We were in MC and IC and holy crap! I never felt such total rage in my life, never knew I could be that angry.

He left within a half hour of me finding that text.

I tripped over his shoe, a story in itself.

Something clicked in me.

That shoe went out the door, then every article of clothing, photo of him, paperwork, everything, out the front door into the snow. A massive pile of his crap.

I then texted him to come get his stuff off the front lawn and to bring garbage bags.

Then, I went on facebook, his page, posted a recent picture of the two of us with a post that seemed to come from him.

"I am scum. I cheated on my wife and left her. Then I pretended to work on our marriage and go to therapy with her. I lied. I cheated again with a skank. I should be ostracized for my evil behavior."

Then, I friended all of his contacts, he is an umpire and very concerned with his image with these men.

Immature? Very. It sure did make me feel better. Especially when he asked me if I wanted to rent a billboard. I replied, sure if you will pay for it!

It didn't end there, he was emailing and texting about how sorry he was, I love you, all a bunch of lies. I was able to read all his texts on the computer. He did not know this.

He was texting new ow, really obscene and graphic and also texting another woman on Match. All while he was proclaiming his remorse and love.

I went into his Match account, guessed his password and change it to looking for men. Then I emailed verbatim everything that he said to ow#2.

His response? "I am not with you anymore, I can say whatever I want to whoever I want".

What an ass.

I suppose that I was just getting into my anger phase and it hit all at once. Not a good time for him to cheat again.

Am I ashamed? NO.

My 29 year old son saw the pile on the front lawn. "I am not too happy with you for doing that", my response, "people have killed for less", he laughed and said, "yeah, I guess you have a point, he is a scumbag".

It did feel good to get that anger out. It hurt his facade and that is where his weak spot is, the false image.

Now, on to irrelevance.

Freebygrace posted 3/16/2014 08:58 AM

Priceless! LOL that is hysterical.

I was horrible. I ruined everything I could for the OW. She really shouldn't have slept with a good friends husband.

First I called her almost xH and told him what a skank she was and that he should file for custody of the 2yo in the divorce, and HE DID!

Then My WH and i were subpeoned to testify in the custody hearing. I told that judge that she was having sex with my H ( her 10 yo's best friends dad) in the hall across from his room at 8 pm. He had to hear it!

She lost custody. Only gets to see her kid 1st 3rd and 5th.

THEN, I mailed a letter to her place of a work, a little doctors office, and told all the women there that they better watch their husbands because she would screw them. And I put in lots of details so they would know it was true. The OW walked out of work that day, and never came back. Didn't even give 2 weeks notice. LOL

I also told my pastor, all our homeschool friends, and everyone confronted her and told her to stay away from our family. She was run out of town. It was a little town. She sold her house and moved within a month of DDAY. She later said that she couldn't even go to the grocery store because people were staring at her like she had the Scarlett A on her chest. Well, if the letter fits, wear it!

So,she lost.
1. Her kid
2. Her home
3. Her friends
4. Her job

I'm a horrible person for being so revengeful. But she is remarried now. Unhappily, I've heard. And it has crossed my mind to befriend her new husband and have an A with him. But I won't do it.

Leia posted 3/16/2014 09:15 AM

STBXWH thought that I wouldn't figure out how to put a battery in the household safe. So, when he was gone, I opened it, cleaned out the contents--he already had everything that he needed--and left a postie note that said "Did you really think I wouldn't figure out how to put a battery in???" I had previously set my own code on it, so I could have access.

When I run into people in our community--without kids--and they ask me how I'm doing I tell the truth. If it is a good day, I'll tell them why, if it is a bad day, I'll let them know that too. Not sweeping it under the rug this time. Nope. I've told everyone that doesn't have kids around them *exactly* what is going on. It has been very healing to me. And, I've found lots and lots of support.

Dreamboat posted 3/16/2014 10:46 AM

I signed up OW for a swinger site online and said that you loovved doing it with M men. I did this after she had contacted me again, after I had repeatedly told her and X that she should never ever contact me again or invade my life in anyway.

OW found out about it because someone contacted her X was soo mad. He called up up and was ranting at me and all I wold say was "Why would I do that?" The dumbass could not answer that simple question. And he was also pissed because the site where I posted would not cooperate except to take the message down.

You would think that would be enough to stop the invasion into my life, but it was not. I kept getting mail and phone calls for her. So the next time I sent her a letter with the names and addresses of everyone in her community that I would contact if I ever go another piece of mail for her. THAT finally stopped the invasion.

DTERMINED2SURVIV posted 3/16/2014 11:08 AM

DREAMBOAT just reminded me. My fws and I got on a chat site and had men text OW pictures of their packages all night. Probably 10 in all but the looks on our faces were priceless.

She changed her number and still has no idea it was us. The weird thing is, it was HIS idea.

Mousse242 posted 3/16/2014 11:10 AM

It was before he was on Facebook but I had the passwords to his email accounts. I changed his password on them and for about two weeks his Yahoo profiles stated that he cheats on his wife, is a lying scum, etc. Eventually I did change his password back, but damn it felt good. If he had FB back then, who knows what I would have done.

PippaPeach6 posted 3/16/2014 15:38 PM

She e-mailed and called from her workplace. So I sent her flowers from a website that anonymously sends dead stinky roses, wrapped in a pretty, romantic package. Had them sent to her very public workplace. On February 13. Note read, "Been tested for STDs lately?"

The city she works in is always in the news for the highest STD rates in our state. . .

I hope she dreads flowers on Valentine's Day forever. Ho.

eta: and she was sleeping with not only her now xh but at least (!!) one other person, and I have no doubt there were more. Double

[This message edited by PippaPeach6 at 3:45 PM, March 16th (Sunday)]

Ostrich80 posted 3/16/2014 16:28 PM

I love these stories. Damn I wish I had the balls you ladies do!!

cantaccept posted 3/16/2014 17:37 PM

Ostrich80,

Honestly, it wasn't balls...it was white hot blinding rage!

I never knew that I could feel such anger, it was a bit shocking for me.

After the horrific mind games, I just lost it. It was a flash of clarity.

He had been blaming me for months for not moving forward, being stuck, not seeing what he was doing.

Just that, regardless of everything else, the fact that he was deliberately gaslighting me just became so clear in that instant that I saw the text from ow#2.

I think I could claim temporary insanity!

Honestly, I am the calmest, most rational person, a new side I never knew existed!

Now, it makes me laugh. He deserved every bit and so very much more.

Chicky posted 3/16/2014 19:13 PM

1. I made 15 copies of every single smutty email, text message, and chat session (about 75 pages each bundle) and mailed them to her parents, sisters & husbands, brothers & wives, her employer, her best friend, the head of the department of the company she was interviewing with at the time, and her ex-husband since they were in a custody battle. Best $100 I ever spent!

2. I reported her behavior on company time using company resources (cell, land line, and expense account) to her employer.

3. I also informed her employer that she was a regular pot smoker and that they might want to random drug test her.

#2 & #3 got her terminated from a near 6 figure a year job and the packet I sent to the potential employer resulted in her not being hired.

Now, after all that she had the nerve to threaten to sue me and since I am in an alienation of affection state, I invited her to do just that so I could sue her ass right back. I also reminded her that I still had about 15 naked pictures she sent to my husband and I was just waiting for a reason to mail those out as well as use them as Exhibits X, Y, & Z.

I also informed her that I did all that out of irritation with her whorish ways but if she kept effing with me, I would show her what I was really capable of when I'm angry.

eta: I know that revenge is not encouraged or condoned on SI. Having said that, I don't consider this revenge - I consider it karmic consequences.

[This message edited by Chicky at 7:19 PM, March 16th (Sunday)]

somer222 posted 3/16/2014 19:16 PM

cantaccept, your experience was much like mine with my ex! Right down to the match.com account and with me being able to see what he was doing while he was still professing his great love and desire to R with me.

I changed his match.com profile by guessing his password and also emailed all of the women he'd been in touch with to let them know the truth about him.

I never considered reconciliation with my ex. The way I found about about his cheating was when a stripper/prostitute called me to complain about him! I was more than shocked. The "persona" my ex had, which I found was fake, was that of a very nice and sincere man.

Pretty sure my ex is a sociopath. I was very happy to get away from him, once I knew the truth about him.

Virginiagirl posted 3/16/2014 19:51 PM

God I wish I had done some of this shit. Mostly because I found out later thier A never stopped and he was still lying to her and telling her we were separated. So he got to keep her thinking he was a decent human. Wish I hadn't taken the "high road" now.
I thought I had her address & signed her up for as much junk mail and extreme special interest groups as I could that I knew she'd find offensive. That gave me smiles. Then it turns out that I'd found an old address, old city. Dammit! By then it was so far past day that I didn't bother doing it again. Hopefully some gets forwarded. And whenever I could, I gave her phone # out with the subscriptions. At least I know that was right! Sometimes I still want to tell her the real deal of what happened- but fuck her. And fuck him. Let him keep wallowing in his lie-filled mess.

MoonLitSmile posted 3/16/2014 20:21 PM

Whatever I've done, I can say it will never be enough!

FOW had sent my FWH about a dozen little videos (about 30-45seconds each) of herself masturbating...well, I guess that's what she called it- pretty damn lame actions and some very cheesey 'moaning'...anyway, when I found said videos and numerous naked pics I was beyond enraged- homicidal may more accurately describe how I was feeling at that moment. A little backstory to these videos: before she sent them, she made FWH promise that he would delete each and every one as soon as he watched them (she's a teacher so I assume she did not want them getting out). So of course, being the stand up and honest man that he was, he agreed to delete them but then kept them!!! Score one huge one for me!!! ...after I calmed down, my first instinct was to spread the love. So, I drafted a very angry, very detailed email outing her 6+ month affair with my still very married husband. I emailed it to her and copied her sisters and her father on it (who by the way is a serial cheater and on wife number five at the mature age of 70). I also imbedded a huge picture of her hoo-ha and attached a handful of her self-made pornos I later found out that the videos were indeed viewed by all

I figure that if she didn't want her privates viewed by the public, or her family for that matter, then she shouldn't have sent them to MY husband!

ETA: it is extremely obvious that the video is of her- besides the money shots, there is very clear footage of her bedroom and her raspy voice is unmistakable

[This message edited by MoonLitSmile at 8:26 PM, March 16th (Sunday)]

Chicky posted 3/16/2014 21:35 PM

Oh, I wish I had found a treasure trove like that!!!! ^^^

hikingwithkoda posted 3/17/2014 12:00 PM

Just be careful with the revenge, folks. This woman faces multiple charges as a result:

http://www.timesleader.com/news/news/1249893/Nude-photo-suspect-in-alleged-scuffle-with-TV-reporter

Of course, she made it worse by slugging a reporter, but still, she wouldn't have been at the courthouse in the first place if she hadn't posted OW's photos on Facebook...