That's interesting. I think some people don't set good boundaries. I would never even desire to go out with single friends until 5 am. I would rather sleep! LOL
But some people lack those boundaries. Why did I have to marry one of them?
Regardless of parents dying, teenagers, and work schedules vows should be kept. Especially when things are not smooth. Bonding together during times of stress and mourning especially is why you have a partner!
If you didn't like to do things with your wife, then she should've stayed home with you. Get a hobby that she can do near you, like read or something. Going outside the marriage is not a solution. I'm sorry you have gone through all of this.