SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Does anyone know if divorce trial records are public? Searchable on the Internet? How it all works?

STBX wants to seal the whole trial and records.

Over my dead body is my first response. Then again, do I really want my children knowing someday that their dad is a sex addict freak?

Unfortunately, yes your kids need to know, so they can help keep themselves safe when they're older.

They typically are not available online but, as a matter of public record, it's possible that someone could go down to the courthouse and ask to view the physical documents. Online, it will list that there is a civil or family matter between the two parties but when the document is clicked on, it will show a privacy document explaining why the record is not viewable online in most jurisdictions that have online records available.

Depending on where you live, a listing of the records may not even be viewable online. You can test it by going to the clerk of courts online for the county you will be divorced in. Put in the name of someone you know is divorced and see what comes up.

If I remember correctly, you and I are in the same state.

I don't know if the whole trial record will be available because mine didn't go to trial. But all of the documents for mine are available for search on the county prothonotary website. All of the documents can be viewed online.

If you know of anyone who has had a divorce that has gone to trial, you can search the website and see what documentation shows up.

I know when my brother got divorced several years ago--in a different county--it had to be published in the newspaper. When Grandma passed, and we were going through stuff, we found the little book that was handed out at his first wedding, with all the pics Grandma had kept, and the clipping from the newspaper that showed their D was final. Was I glad his new wife didn't find it!!!

I'd test it out like Tearsoflove suggested so you know what to expect.

If you're concerned with what your children may find out in the far future, watch what is published with the obits in your area--morbid, I know. I googled my deceased-for-many-years-grandfather and found out that he had another child in a different state that no one in the family knew about and I have a half-first cousin that knew there was another child but knew nothing about the rest of us. All the players in this drama--grandfather's first wife, both of the children, etc. are now deceased, but it was a shake up to everyone to find out this stuff many, many years later. Hope this isn't a t/j, but family information hangs around forever.

If you are the least bit ambivalent, and he is "demanding" it, then use it as a bargaining tool. Agree to seal the record if you get something very concrete and definable, in return. Not a promise, not tied to support. Perhaps a different balance of the debt or alimony?

I will tell you that of the few people I know who went to trial, everyone hated what happened. No one felt "good" about it. It may be something you end up wanting sealed too. Just a thought.

All good points. Thank you everyone.

I'll try to figure out how it works here. I'll also ask the attorneys again. I never get a straight answer from them.

And hell yes, I'll use it for leverage.

Thank you.