For 6 months I've been swinging wildly between trying to get through today and obsessing over what might
happen in the future.
I pray that WH doesn't backslide, but that's really out of my control. He's struggling mightily with something today and doesn't want to discuss it. After some short-lived agida, I'm at peace with it. He'll share once he has had time to process whatever is on his mind. (or he won't.)
I have been preparing meals because 2 of the kids are living at home right now, but for months have been defaulting to far too much comfort food. This week I planned (and executed!) much healthier meals. I went for a walk at lunch time today despite the cold and wind.
I've felt so stuck for months now. I'm not sure what is different this week, but for some reason I'm ready to move forward, outcome be damned. I'll reallocate some of the energy from worrying about As to taking care of myself. Hell, if I didn't have an IC appointment tonight I'd go get a pedicure.
I have no idea why today feels different, but I'm very grateful that it does.