So I have finally filed for divorce. I feel like I really gave it all I could. After a year of going through this hell I need out.
My main problem now seems to be a common theme with so many others here. Just feeling jaded. Though I know it's not always true my feeling on love stands as this: what is the point? Loving someone and giving yourself to them completely is giving them the power to completely destroy you. I feel that I have such a wall erected around my heart currently and he will always be the one who has the only ammo that can still penetrate my wall and never miss my heart.
I feel like it is going to take me years to get over all that he has done to me. And in addition the poor decisions he continues to make.
I know that I am ruined for any man that might love me in the foreseeable future because I am so jaded. I feel like I just still want to wallow in my self pity.
All I have.... Is nothing.
All I've treasured... Is dust.
You came at me with no warning.
You've broken all of my trust.
Where do I go now?
What path is the right to follow?
You handed me a fist full of glass.
Why look confused when I can't swallow?
I built my world around you.
Hindsight points to bricks.
Oh if only I had known big bad wolf,
I wouldn't have chosen sticks....
[This message edited by Roxyme765 at 5:36 PM, March 21st (Friday)]
Me: BS, 30
Him: WS, 30
D-Day: April 2013 (about 5 years of cheating with multiple OW)
2 or 3? false R.
DIVORCED! 07/2014!!