Throw it away. Your emotional well being is much more important than some jacket that HE likes.
I'm so sorry this happened - it sounds like a horrible trigger.
Is it odd that the hair would've stayed on the jacket for 6 months, in the closet? Or was it tucked away kind of tight?
Well... I didn't get rid of the pants or shirt (or even underwear) that he was wearing that day... and they don't really trigger me... the jacket wasn't the problem, really... it was the hair. I don't even think throwing the jacket away would help. (Although, his offer to throw it away helped... he offered to burn it in the firepit. actually, maybe that would help!)
When I told him about it, after he got home, he looked wounded. He hugged me and cried, and offered to burn the jacket. He's handling it exactly the way I need him to... but it just brought it all back... and for a minute... it was just like dday all over again.
Now I want to go back to her day job and kick her ass. Or at least make her think I might.
Or at least make her think I might.
That is far more satisfying. Fear is a far better prison for her, and zero risk for you.
At any rate sorry to hear about your trigger. Maybe disinfect the jacket. No need to soil all of your hard work on the patches or to toss a gift from your heart. Put in a bag with some moth balls after you douse it with a heavy hit of lysol. Give it a few weeks and if it survives, toss it in the wash and start all fresh.