SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

So...I think its just now hitting me... but I wanted to put this out there. I think I've been in denial for 2 weeks....but Piper's adopted Nana....my friend's (Piper's Godmother's) mom whom I've known for 29 years of my 34 years on this planet.... had a stroke 2 weeks ago and is still in the hospital.

They moved her to rehab but she will be in there at least 3 more weeks due to the severity and type of stroke she had. She can't function the majority of the right side of her body because the stroke occurred on the left side of the brain.

We visited her initially a couple of times but now she can't have visitors for a couple of days. My daughter knows who she is....but acts like a "deer caught in the headlights" and doesn't run to her like she normally would. It saddens me. Its like she doesn't know how to react to her. It reminds me of when my boxer Duchess had to be put to sleep.... and her sister Molly wouldn't go near her body afterwards....like she was afraid of her.....like she knew something was wrong and different...

I told them that I will do whatever they need me to do and be there for them for anything. I feel as if my own mother had a stroke...because she is the closest I have to a real mom since my own basically disowned my sister and I for her own selfish reasons. I just hate to see her this way.

Please keep her in your prayers.... she needs all the help she can get!

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 12:59 PM, March 27th (Thursday)]

(((Shelly, Piper, Nana)))

So sorry to read that Shelly. Sending prayers for a full recovery.

(((Shelly, Nana and Piper)))

Prayers for Nana Shelly, I'm so very sorry. ((Hugs)) for all of you.

Keeping Nana in my prayers.

I live in God's Waiting Room, rehab is the best place for her, lots of people come out of rehab much better than when the entered. The brain is a very adaptable organ, rehab helps it to rewire itself to learn everyday tasks all over again.

11 years ago next month, my dad had a stroke, he was in the hospital for Three dAys before he could utter a word. He spent 2 months in rehab. His issues are a blind spot from 1-3 o'clock in his vision, and a processing problem from brain to mouth. He can see an orange, but he can't speak it. He can write it and describe how it tastes, but for some reason he can't say the word that's on the tip of his tongue. Heck I have that problem most days-and I didn't have a stroke.

Sending prayers and hugs. Rehab had my dad reading aloud, maybe that's something Piper can help with?

Praying for Nana....and for you and Piper, Shelly.

Hang in there.

Thinking good thoughts for you all Shelly...

Prayers for her that she recovers quickly and fully.

Thank you everyone. I visited her this weekend and she looked so much better than a week ago. She has movement in her right arm which is HUGE and she is more cognizant of what you say and can remember things from the past when you talk with her. That was comforting.

I miss her. I know my daughter misses her too. Piper seemed much more active with her this time...wanted to romp in her lap and hug and kiss her and cuddle. That was another good sign.

On a very selfish level, I miss her spending time with my daughter and not having the freedom to do things with the comfort of knowing my daughter is with someone she loves and trust. With someone who doesn't care if I'm late (which I never am) and just someone who WANTS to spend time with her. I was very lucky to have her for so long so I could do so many things.

But, on an unselfish level....I just want her to get better and be happy again. I know she is frustrated.... but hoping the healing process doesn't take her too long.

I hope she recovers well. I know it's not on point, so I hope you don't mind my intrusion. This is the best time to have her daughter talk to an elder law attorney (and not any other kind of atty). That's what I do for a living and I help folks find and pay for good care. So even if she doesn't need care when she comes out of rehab, she may in the future and planning ahead is the best thing to make the most of the options she has. One option would be the VA Aid and Attendance benefit, if she or her husband served at least 90 days of active duty service. This benefit would pay her up to $1130 month of tax free income to help cover care and medical costs. But an elder law atty can walk you through all those options and get everything covered. It's really time well spent. If she doesn't know anyone check out the National Academy of Elder Law Attys www.naela.org.

I really don't mean to go off topic, but I've seen so many families struggle and suffer when they don't get the right help and don't know all the options and I don't want your soul-sister to be in that position.

I can relay the information but I don't think they can afford an atty. They struggle with bills really bad and have struggled to the point of the phone being shut off and various other issues. Nana was on disability already and not working, her husband died of a heart attack about 3 years ago and she is a widow and her daughter is the only one working and living in the home helping out. Its a tough situation. Her daughter has never moved away from home and she is my age... (34)