After several years on these boards and living my own experience with an unremorseful wayward, I have to say that I don't think very many actually wake up, at least not before the BS' heart has closed. Your WH sounds like a guy who walks around in complete denial. He pushes the pain aside and compartmentalizes the fact that his wife is gone and his kids don't want to be around him. This is how he prefers to function because then he doesn't have to feel pain or face the horror caused by his behavior. It's very hard for normal thinking, rational people to understand, but this is what they do.
The bigger question is, what would you do if he does wake up? Would you want him back after all the lies and cruel, heartless behavior?
I know it's so hard after all these years of marriage and living an entire life together. But, I also see that we, as the BS, walk around in a big fog for a while after the shitstorm hits. We fantasize about the wayward coming home and making it all better. I've asked the same questions as you. But, eventually, with enough time, reflection, and NC, you start to come out of the fog and recognize that he's not worthy of you. You start to see that his purpose in your life is over and that, wherever this life takes you, from here on in, it will be free of his effed up brand of "love".
Grieve the marriage and mourn the man he once was. That guy is gone. The overgrown toddler that took his place is not someone on which to waste your precious time or energy. I know, way easier said than done. But, the point is that his rock bottom doesn't matter anymore. - when it comes or where it is on the rock bottom spectrum. What matters is making sure that you protect your heart and let it close to him a little bit more every day.