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Sadmumma posted 3/28/2014 06:22 AM

Do you ever just feel totally drained, exhausted for having to deal with crap?

Today was pretty crappy. I took my dog to he veT as she has a lump on her leg. Turns out its a tumour. They may need to amputate the leg. She's an old girl(13 years) but a beautiful dog. It broke my heart. I don't wan the girls to lose their pet.

On the way home from the vet I got 'rear ended'. It was minor.. No major damage.. But still.

After that we witnessed a major collision. Police were called, roads were blocked off, I think someone passed.

Then, this evening I get a series of texts

WH : are the girls available to see this weekend or are you stopping me again?

ME: hang on a minute. I told you that we were busy most weekends through March. Last weekend we had something booked which ID given you a months notice about.id appreciate you dropping the attitude.

WH: f$ck you

Me: wow really

WH : yeah really. Keep using them as tools. Idiot.

Me: oh well when you are prepared to be civil with me and not rude I'm happy to discuss this weekends plans with you.

*crickets*

WTF???

I'm really not sure where his anger is coming from. I have not heard a peep from him all week (I have not msg him either 180/NC)..

I had booked some family photos for last weekend. I told him about it at he start of the month (well not the pics but we had plans). I made a point of telling him as I said that I wanted him to realise it was every Sunday we'd had something planned and I didn't want him to think I was stopping him from seeing the kids. He actually replied that he understands that life goes on...

I have the text messages that I was going to screens hot and text him. But I figured that would be breaking NC. For crying out loud.... I just feel drained.

[This message edited by Sadmumma at 6:23 AM, March 28th (Friday)]

Ivyivy posted 3/28/2014 06:59 AM

I hear you and am sorry for everything that you are going through. After Dday, everything became a struggle for me, even little things, so days where everything goes wrong are just exhausting and demoralizing. Don't let WH's texts get to you (to the extent you can). Focus on you and the kids and do something that you will enjoy together. I hope your day goes better today as well as your weekend.

Sadmumma posted 3/28/2014 09:03 AM

Thanks ivy......

I guess I'm just confused as to why he went in the attack out of the blue like that...

I really wanted to msg him back but I've just go no energy to deal with his crap right now.

NeverAgain2013 posted 3/28/2014 09:05 AM

Is he paying support? Is there a custody order in place?

I'm awful sorry to hear about your doggy. Bless her heart.

yearsofpain25 posted 3/28/2014 09:15 AM

Hi Sadmumma,

I hear ya today. I had to put my beloved dog down back in the beginning of Feb. Cancer in her spleen. I still miss my beloved girl badly. And having to deal with everything else...sometimes it's enough to make you shut down. I hope your doggy will be ok.

In fact, a dear friend of mine and I were having an email conversation yesterday about being exhausted with with everything. I want you to know that you are not alone today and I'll be thinking of you. In fact, I may start a separate thread on my feelings from yesterday that I shared with my friend. Don't want to t/j on your fur baby and other crap you are dealing with.

yop.

norabird posted 3/28/2014 10:37 AM

I'm sorry about the triple whammy of the dog, the fender bender, and seeing the accident.

Your WH clearly was feeling badly about himself -- maybe because he doesn't have it together as a father to arrange visitation -- but he can't admit the truth about his bad parenting, so of course it has to be your fault. But you're doing good with the 180/NC and I am sure your DDs know the truth about who is their actually caring parent. And that is what matters, not his warped perception of things.

You are a great mom.

Sadmumma posted 3/29/2014 03:10 AM

Never again - He is paying support but there is No order in place. He doesn't have a home so it's kind of pointless (I thought)

YOP. Thanks so much for your thoughts. I'll go gave a look at your thread..l

Thanks Nora.... I think you might me right... I think he's demonising me in an effort to justify his actions.