Do you know who you are? Do you know what's happened to you? Do you want to live this way?
A quote from Christina in Greys Anatomy. Three simple questions that could speak to either a BS or a WS.
Do you know who you are?
I'm beginning to remember. I lost so much of who I was over the last 4 years. Most days I don't recognize myself. I used to be chipper, excited for what life had to offer, innocent, strong. Now I am a shell. Not knocking myself here, I know there is another side and this is part of the process. It just shows me how much I have to work on me. It shows how much crap I have tolerated. How much I *LET* him abuse me.
Do you know how you for here?
I haven't felt "worthy" - ever. What he offered me in the beginning was "enough". Enough to let me hold on to, for years. Despite the fact that he wasn't offering me that anymore. For years I convinced myself I had the best husband ever. I convinced myself I didn't deserve him. After the first Dday - I couldn't let go of the outcome, of fixing him, of getting my happily ever with him. No matter what it costed me.
Do you want to live this way?
No. Not at all. No part of me wants this life.
So the question really is, for me anyways - what are you going to do about it?
Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016
Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an
