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Newest Member: Starrystarrynight

New Beginnings :
T/j on my circus post.

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 Williesmom (original poster member #22870) posted at 4:59 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

So, I went to cirque by myself this week.

As I walked in the crowd, I saw no other people alone. It made me feel bad. I know that everyone doesn't have someone, so where are all the singles?

I enjoy doing things by myself. I find it relaxing, because I don't have to worry about what someone else thinks, wants, or needs. I guess I'm just perplexed.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6740582
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FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 5:18 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

They were probably out at the bar trying to hook up.

I prefer flying solo myself, as you know...

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21594   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6740606
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Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 5:32 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

You gals are inspiring me! I do some things alone and need to get better at going to more.

Williesmom maybe they went to the matinee performance, I've seen some singles at plays.

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6740618
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 Williesmom (original poster member #22870) posted at 6:07 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Kajem, it's definitley enlightening to just do whateve you want. FaithFool has been my inspiration for this part of my life

As I was walking to my seat, I passed a couple that was arguing loudly. The wife was screaming at her husband while she sobbed. Ugh - no way would I want to be either one of them.

I'll take single any day of the week. The company is fabulous!

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6740644
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GabyBaby ( member #26928) posted at 6:27 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Married or not, I too love doing things by myself.

Just yesterday I went to the movies alone and had a blast.

I think it takes a certain amount of confidence to sit in a restaurant and enjoy a meal on your own. Sometimes I read, other times I just enjoy the people watching.

Don't let couples scare you off. They're probably not paying any attention anyway.

Me - late 40s
DD(27), DS(24, PDD-NOS)

WH#2 (SorryinSac)- Killed himself (May 2015) in our home 6 days after being served divorce docs.
XWH #1 - legally married 18yrs. 12+ OW (that I know of).

I edit often for clarity/typos.

posts: 10094   ·   registered: Dec. 26th, 2009   ·   location: Here and There
id 6740659
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Whalers11 ( member #27544) posted at 6:33 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

None of my single friends are comfortable doing stuff alone. I totally am - I eat out by myself, go to concerts, sporting events, movies, etc. However, I also did a lot of stuff alone when I was in a relationship, so it's no different for me.

posts: 3358   ·   registered: Feb. 11th, 2010
id 6740664
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hexed ( member #19258) posted at 6:49 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

I think that culturally we spend a lot of time trying to find ways to couple up, meet up, pair up.... I don't think that it's all bad but its astonishing how many people cannot be alone.

Because I travel for work, I do lots of things solo or I would never see the cities I travel to. Dinners, art museums, parks, concerts, trails, and anything else worth exploring. I think it takes getting used to and most people don't take the time.

You're just being you! Why miss a chance to go to something just b/c your friends schedules or budgets don't match up with yours? silly I say!

But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler

posts: 9609   ·   registered: Apr. 24th, 2008
id 6740676
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 Williesmom (original poster member #22870) posted at 8:55 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Exactly, hexed. I used to travel for my job also, so I just got used to doing things on my own.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6740778
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Helen of Troy ( member #26419) posted at 9:35 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

You don't see many other singles because most are afraid to go out alone. You are brave they are not. One of my coworkers can't or won't walk across campus alone, she always needs someone's apron strings to hold onto. A forty-something woman who seems like one of the big bosses is her mom. Seriously I feel uneasy watching it all.

This may be biased but when I was married I noticed more singletons. Now divorced, I feel it's just the opposite.

posts: 4809   ·   registered: Dec. 4th, 2009
id 6740810
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 9:39 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

I guess (no, I know ) that none of us live near each other. I think that's the only way we'll see others out on their own. I go out by myself all the time (no other choice at this point) and I never see singles, except maybe at Starbucks.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6740815
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FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 9:40 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

If we all lived near each other we'd be a gang.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21594   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6740818
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CheshCat ( member #27546) posted at 11:45 PM on Saturday, March 29th, 2014

My parents have an amaaaaaaaaaazing marriage.

Actually, out of over 40 individuals in my near-family, I'm only one of 2 divorces. (My grandparents 60+ year marriage was their 2nd marriage). Everyone else has these stellar life long union. (My grandparents give me hope).

Anyhow... My dad was Navy.

He was out to sea 6+ months a year.

Which meant my mom was alone with us.

Which meant I got a stellar example of how to take life by the horns and do stuff alone.

So I do.

Most people don't.

They invite friends, go to meet ups to make friends, have a zillion first dates... What have you.

They all say they need to learn to be more like me.

I need to learn to be more like them!

It just doesn't occur to me to go drag someone with me.

My couple friends periodically thwack me upside the back of the head.

Apparently there is no better "wingman" than a married couple because you have the excuse of "being the 3rd wheel to peel off from" of someone interesting comes around. Blink. Blink. I'm not trying to pick people up! I'm trying to have fun!

So I suspect that there is a happy medium, somewhere.

Between enjoying things on your own, dating in motion, and being with friends.

>^..^<

"Another conversation killed awkwardly! Yes! Point to my side." - Chesh's Brother

Moi : BS MH 30mumble
Him : WS Abuse Adultery Addict Six-figure Sociopath = Aaass
... I picked a winner!
DDay - 2006 ad naseam
Divorced! 2013

posts: 571   ·   registered: Feb. 11th, 2010   ·   location: West Coast US
id 6740927
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