You will get there. It just takes time.
For me it's been a gradual process, but what I've discovered is that while XWH and I were living our lives together, we weren't experiencing things the same way. He was functioning very much as a "man behind the curtain" fake self, while I was being real. Being me. Always.
Sooo... I can still live in the x-marital house, because I love it, and I would have loved it regardless of who else lived here.
I can look fondly back on amazing trips and vacations, because they were incredible experiences, and would have been even if XWH hadn't been there too.
It's been a revelation for me, really, how much of the happiness in the those 8 years came from ME, from the authentic, genuine life I was living. *I* did those things, *I* had those adventures, *I* went to those amazing places. The happy memories didn't disappear when he did, because they were never tied to him, they were tied to ME, and I'm still here.
Very specific couples memories are harder, obviously. Our beautiful wedding on the beach, the first time we met, the first time we kissed, etc. Those still sting, and I think they probably always will. But when you're talking about cars, trips, houses, friendships, etc... I think you'll find those memories are far more connected to you then they are to her. And as more time goes by, you'll remember them that way: part of YOUR life that's going strong, rather that part of the marital life that is now over.