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Newest Member: Phoenix2rise (45723)

User Topic: Where to go to meet people?
nolight
♀ 32785
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm 33 and am over a year out from the final ending with ex H. I now feel ready to start dating but realise I have no idea how to start!

I don't like the idea of meeting someone at a bar although if I were out with friends and met a nice guy I wouldn't be closed to the idea. I'm terrified of being seen as a cougar! It's so annoying that a professional, single woman over 30 can't want to meet a significant other without being termed as such.

I'm not too keen on the idea of online dating either as it raises potential issues for my professional life.

So! Where do you go to meet men? The gym? Church functions? Friends? I'd love to hear your stories!


Posts: 517 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
TrustedHer
♂ 23328
Member # 23328
Default  Posted: 10:28 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I suggest Meetup.com.

If you have a hobby already, there's a group for that. If you don't, consider a new hobby.

I don't mean to use the group to find a date. Make friends there. Your network of friends can get you connections to others they know.

The more people you know, and who know you, the more people you can meet.

It's a personal thing, but gyms, churches, and bars are not ideal for me, for various reasons.


Take care of yourself. There's a great future out there. It won't come to you; you have to go to it.

Posts: 5195 | Registered: Mar 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 12:12 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A cougar at 33????

Pardon me...

Seriously; listen to TH. Join some meetups. You can even start your own if you don't find one you'd like.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20436 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
nolight
♀ 32785
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 1:30 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for your advice, I will definitely look into it. And thanks for making me laugh about the cougar bit !

Posts: 517 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
nolight
♀ 32785
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 1:47 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh wow! I'd never heard of meetup.com and just had a look, you've just opened me up to a new world!

I don't just mean potential-partner-meeting but finding others to do those random-things-I-enjoy-doing-but-my-friends-all-think-I'm-mad activities with!

I've just signed up to join a hiking group as I can not think of anything better to do with my Saturday then crawl over some mountain covered in mud but have been resorting dangerously taking myself off on my own to do.

It has been hard as I have only been in the states for two months, and have made some friends but don't want to encroach on them too much. This will hopefully be a great way to widen my social circle because I have been a little lonely and homesick of late.

[This message edited by nolight at 1:54 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday)]


Posts: 517 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
million pieces
♀ 27539
Member # 27539
Default  Posted: 6:01 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was going to suggest Meetup also.

But I thought the definition of cougar was an over 40 yr old woman dating an <30 yr man. And at 33 yrs old, you wouldn't be considered old at all in my local bar scene at all, but I know that varies dramatically. I still remember feeling like a teenage pregnant mom at 30 compared to most of the older moms in the Northern VA area


Me - 42
2 kids, 9 and 12
D-Day 2/5/10, separated 3 wks later
Divorced 11/15/11!!!!

Posts: 1278 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: MD
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do the hiking/nature-related meetups too. I belonged to a great hiking group in AZ that did social things too--mostly meals/drinks after a hike, but we also had anniversary parties (for the group). They were a diverse bunch but we meshed well. I haven't found anything like that since I moved (several times ) but I keep trying. You'll be glad you did this

Have fun!

[This message edited by Sad in AZ at 8:19 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday)]


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20436 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
better4me
♀ 30341
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 8:44 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sounds like meetup.com is a great match for what you are looking for! Yea.

I'm not too keen on the idea of online dating either as it raises potential issues for my professional life.
I was worried about this also, but really it hasn't been a problem. OLD is so common anymore no one looks askance at it.


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:53
Divorced

Posts: 3235 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Topic Posts: 8

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