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Newest Member: Thranduilion (61515)

User Topic: Gee Thanks WH - Suspicious Tendacies Now
♀ 37225
Member # 37225
Default  Posted: 8:44 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I started seeing a new guy and I have noticed that I am suspicious of things he does or doesn't do. It may or may not be warranted.

I know this is a hangover from WH. I trusted too much. There is a potential between this new guy and I and I am afraid my own issue is going to be a problem for just not this guy but future as well.

How does one work through the suspicious feelings? I don't think time will fix this and I need to figure out how to handle it.

Posts: 264 | Registered: Oct 2012
little turtle
♀ 15584
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 9:15 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What things are suspicious of?

Failure is success if we learn from it.

3 boys: 11, 9, and 1.

Posts: 4796 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
♀ 41033
Member # 41033
Default  Posted: 11:32 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Maybe you shouldn't be so fast to work through those feelings. Depending on what it is you are suspicious of, you may just be more conscious of what to pay attention to because of what you've experienced in the past. I would listen to those feelings, and then trust but verify.

Posts: 892 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Illinois
♀ 3703
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 12:40 PM, April 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was dating a guy and I kept having alarms go off, I kept blaming it on "wow, I'm so paranoid after what XWH did to me". Except I wasn't being paranoid. He was being shady, seeing other people, along with still f*&%$$g his ex-wife.

BW - 40
DD - 7 years old
D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

Posts: 5453 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
♀ 31468
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 2:57 AM, April 5th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

There is a difference between being suspicious and recognizing red flags...trusting your instincts is an important part of that - do NOT discount your instincts.

[This message edited by persevere at 2:57 AM, April 5th (Saturday)]

Me: BW-46
Him: XWH-46

Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

Posts: 5287 | Registered: Mar 2011
Topic Posts: 5

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