But the biggest thing is I no longer respect her.For so many years I viewed as an honest woman with a strong moral compass. All that has gone. She has lied to me for at least a year, she detroyed me (temporarily) emotionally, she detroyed our family. Shattered hopes and dreams. Acted in a mannner that is so self absorbed and selfish. This I cannot respect. I can no longer look at her with the admiration I once cherished. She no longer goes to church, no longer cares about me or the family.
For these reasons I no longer respect her. Another emotion/feeling to process.
Deal with the present.
Her: WW/57 Me: BS/63 24yrs M
3 great kids, now 22, 20, 17 b,b,g
D-Day 8/14/08, D 1/13/11
One step at a time, one breath at a time, you are going to be okay. (((hugs)))
You can see more of my story on my blog here: http://thatcraftylunchlady.com/?p=833
"Never give up hope and let time heal you"
The only way humanly possible for you to feel a shred of respect for your WS is for her to earn it back..She has to realize the enormity of what she did to you and move mountains to help you heal...
The way she treated you with her cheating behavior was so very disrespectful to you and family..
The opposite of respect is abuse..
[This message edited by doggiediva at 10:28 AM, April 7th (Monday)]
Respect is just another thing to mourn and bury because it is dead, along with our old marriage.
BS me 41
WH 42 his whore was my friend
Married 24 years
Finally finding R?
3 kids 3 grand kids
DDay 1 -Jan 2 2014
DDay 2 -Feb 20 2014 A went underground fo
Respect, like trust, IMO, is earned back one single drop at a time. And for me, at least, pieces of it come back a bit at a time. Do I respect the effort that he's making? Yes. Do I respect the changes that he is putting in place? Yes. Do I respect that he is fighting his own demons and is truthful enough to open up about them when he feels them trying to take his mind somewhere that it shouldn't go? Yes. Do I respect his mind, his intelligence. Yes. Do I, to his core, respect him? Not quite. I think that it will come, but today is not that day. Not yet.
D-Day, June 10, 2012