I sent this email to FWH a few weeks after d-day and it spelled it out!
This whole affair has really prompted me to review our life together. I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I deserve as your wife and what you deserve as my husband. So, here it goes:
I deserve to be unconditionally loved. Loved when I'm mad and loved when I'm happy. I deserve to be understood
I deserve to be respected as a wife, mother and individual.
I deserve a husband who comes home from work with a smile on his face because he is happy to see me.
I deserve to come in first and foremost in your life. My wants and my needs should matter. No matter how much our world spins out of control, I deserve this.
I deserve a husband who wants to make love to me and only me. I also deserve a husband who understands when I am not in the mood and respects that
I do not deserve mean comments. Even things said in anger hurt
I deserve a husband who accepts me as the only woman in his life. A husband who, no matter how bad things get, will never, ever look to another woman for comfort.
I deserve to be listened to. Just because you don't think it is important, it is to me. Listen to me and don't judge me.
I deserve a husband who understands that sometimes I just don't feel like cooking
I deserve a husband who is kind and caring towards me. A husband who treats me like the classy lady that I am and not a maid and mother
I deserve a husband who wants to spend time having fun with me.
I deserve a husband who plans special things for me. A surprise once in awhile wouldn't hurt at all
I deserve to feel special like I am the only woman in the world who matters.
I deserve a husband who doesn't ogle other women.
I deserve a husband who doesn't flirt with other women.
I deserve a husband who will treat me like a queen no matter what.
I deserve a husband who is truly sorry for what he has done and would walk over hot coals for me if it would make me feel better.
I deserve a husband who understands the depth of my pain. The loss of part of my marriage is almost more than I can bear.
I deserve full disclosure. Not only about the things the two of you did but the effect it had on us.
I deserve for you to be honest with me about your feelings concerning her.
I deserve a huaband who will support my goals and dreams.
I deserve to be unconditionally loved by my husband forever.