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thinking ahead

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notmychoice posted 4/9/2014 06:51 AM

This past year I have been consumed with all the divorce type stuff. I can see the end within the next couple of months. Then what? How is it going to feel? There will be no reason to keep in contact at all as the kids don't have a relationship with him. Will this be healing or will I find myself missing the drama? If the kids have a relationship with him in the future, how will I handle that? How do you share your time with your kids?

norabird posted 4/9/2014 10:03 AM

Are you in IC to talk through these questions? they are all very good ones. Part of you may miss the drama--which presents a great opportunity to wean yourself off of that desire for chaos, and to learn what will truly make you happy, i.e. consistency, calm, peace. There will be setbacks and moments of pain and fear and loss, but also a huge amount of new opportunity as you stop focusing on him and begin to truly focus on yourself. It's not an easy journey but you will grow so much from it.

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