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strongerdaybyday posted 4/9/2014 09:02 AM

I recently moved back to the city I grew up - to be closer to my parents. S and most likely D has been really hard. The hardest decision I have ever made. I go from moments of relief to anxiety and panic. Anyway, I've felt about down about myself and myself esteem got stomped on after the Dday. But -- I have run into three ex-bf's (from high school - before I met H) and they've all said the same thing, "wow stronger you look amazing, you look great." and I know I shouldn't get my self esteem from someone and it comes from within (blah, blah, blah ) BUT DAMN it felt good. It was such an ego boost. I realized how I let my H hold me back. If I would want to wear my hair down or dress nice for work his attitude would be "which man are doing that for?" and I realized it was his own stupidity, low self esteem and fear that if he had an A I would too. I looked dumpy/frumpy for so long. Those 3 compliments made me realize how much of myself I let go of and let him control during the 10+ years we were together. I've come to the realization that S and D are not a mistake...it actually feels really good.

norabird posted 4/9/2014 10:01 AM

I love this post! Good for you. I see nothing wrong with being glad that these men saw you and responded positively to your new energy. You get to control you now--hallelujah. The more time goes by, the more this awesome feeling will predominate.

Pentup posted 4/9/2014 10:32 AM

Like

nowiknow23 posted 4/9/2014 10:40 AM

Yay for feeling good!