SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

libertyrocks posted 4/9/2014 18:20 PM

I don't love STBXH. SOB already broke my heart into a million pieces. I'm over him. But, I checked out our phone bill and he's still calling all kinds of other girls. I don't know why I care so much. Maybe I'm just jealous because I'm all alone.... THANK GOD I GOT RID OF HIM! lol. I knew it!!!!!!!!!!!! Damn it, I knew it!!!!!!!!!!! He's a liar and playboy for life!! AND, he lied about the girls I found on facebook when you type their phone numbers in. Just yesterday. He's such a liar. I don't know why I care. It's kind of bothering me now. I guess I didn't want to believe what a POS he really is. It just gets me because he's so great at lying. Even now, when there's no way in hell I even want to see his face.

AlwaysBeenStrong posted 4/9/2014 19:05 PM

I am in the same boat, but it's not because I still love him, it because he's destroyed what I thought I would have forever as our vows stated. I just seen his messages to the tramp/"friend" after the 1st affair today, (which I warned her he is married and to stay away). She did not, and his weak little head chose the homewrecker. I am sitting here hating the fact I am going through all of this, while he is having the time of his life. It truly is a roller coaster hell of a ride.

I will sit back and patiently watch as his Karma bus runs his ass over, especially when he has no money because he has to fork it over to me for alimony.

BAB61 posted 4/9/2014 19:48 PM

I don't care, because I realized he's a broken sad assclown ... he can't tell me the truth because deep down he's ashamed of it. He would rather D than own up to his issues to R.

It's hard to realize that the future you thought you had is no longer possible. You may be thinking he's having the time of his life, but remember .. he's broken, and sad inside. He's looking to fill a hole that external things won't fill.

You will recover from the heartache and be happy. He most likely will not be happy, ever.

StillLivin posted 4/9/2014 20:33 PM

Asking them not to lie is like asking water not to be wet. It is just what they are like water is just water.

Gr8Lady posted 4/9/2014 20:42 PM

You care because he wasn't capable of treating you like AP

I understand. He wasn't capable plain and simple

Caretaker1 posted 4/9/2014 21:41 PM

FB is such a friggin waste. It causes so many issues and why ...to say I woke up today and scratched myself .,,what are all you other FarmVille people doing today. Uggggg

Leia posted 4/9/2014 21:43 PM

I have to say that after STBXWH hijacked the FB account I was using, and that my L said to not start another, I'm surprisingly ok with not being on it. I do miss the authors that I followed, but other than that, eh. Take a FB vacation. Trust me, life will get a lot better when you don't have to see what other people are doing.

norabird posted 4/9/2014 22:26 PM

Can you get him or you off of the joint phone plan?

I just switched over to this company called Kitty Wireless, it's really cheap if money is an issue.

But you care because you are a person whose emotions run deep, instead of focusing on surface distractions. Think about it: these connections aren't authentic. They don't involve true intimacy. He's using these women. It's a truly disgusting way to be.

I know that it still hurts that he is choosing and preferring such a despicable pursuit, that his ego and desire to feel wanted and get the validating thrill of conquest take priority over a good, loving relationship. But that is his brokenness. It's sad and demoralizing to see it--it makes your giving so much of yourself to him in the past seem like a farce, since he clearly can't appreciate the worth of what you offered, and it is a slap in the face to think something you know is precious is being thrown away (those doubts of 'what if he's getting something better?' that creep in), but really and truly it is far better to be alone than to be the type of person with so little ability to act with integrity.

The fact is, you are a good and loving person who is realizing that your love was going to someone who never deserved it. It's a harsh awakening. Don't beat yourself up for your feelings even though there isn't a strong rational basis for them, and remember--you are the one who can hold your head high, and that is going to count for a lot in your future happiness versus his future continued dissatisfaction.